Eat, Drink & Be Mary...Douglass!

A Conversation with a Giraffe

2012-02-08T22:26:00.002-05:00

Setting: A sunny day outside with my Sophie the Giraffe and my camera happy mom.The conversation went a little like this:

"Just hanging out in my loungy chair with my giraffe named Sophie. She's French. Oui."

"Oh Sophie the Giraffe, I love you so so much. Your pitch black eyes. Your squeaky body. Your chewable ossicones."

"Yeah, that's what those little horns are called. I'm glad my mom looked that up on Wikipedia and has been boasting how she knows that word now."

"Wait! How did you end up upside down??"

"Oh, thank goodness. You're right side up again. But why does my mom keep taking pictures?"

"You know, Sophie, there may be a day when I find another toy I like. But it doesn't mean I don't still love you. This is hard to talk about..."

"Oh, who am I kidding! You'll always be my favorite!"

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Lots of Bad Pictures

2012-01-21T15:40:00.000-05:00

I can't even imagine having a baby during a time before digital cameras. We take hundreds of pictures of our Sweet Girl, only to look back at the images and realize we have just one worth keeping.

Things were a little different for my parents....taking 24 pictures on their 35mm camera and getting them developed at their local Revco...only to discover that I had my eyes closed, mouth open or arms shaking in every single one of them. All for $4.99.

But today we click-click-click away and upload the good ones to Shutterfly (when there are 100 free print promos!) and laugh at the bad ones.

Here are some especially sweet bad ones:

Christmas Morning 2011

I have several questions about this fine gem of a picture: Why are Mimi's feet so red? Why did I not put an angel or bow or anything on top of our tree?? Why do I still look pregnant? Why is Mimi scratching her face...again?

Christmas Morning 2011. Take 2.

Oh, so much worse. Full on tantrum. And still bright red feet. And topless tree.


Another meltdown.

I thought she looked cute in her Feltman Brothers' dress. She obviously disagreed.

Leaving the Hospital

This is actually a kind of sweet story. As we were leaving the hospital, a precious old lady wanted to take our picture. She had very cute blue hair and was possibly Moses' sister. Of course we wanted to indulge her. And there was no way we were going to tell her how fuzzy the picture turned out.

Mimi on her 2 month birthday

"Mom, I'm not interested. And my hair is all static-y."

Mountain Weekend, January 2011

It seems we stunned the little girl by making her leave her warm fireside place in the den to take a family picture outside. It was quite chilly and she is not amused.

I'm sure we will have hundreds more bad pictures in the future. And, don't worry, I'll be glad to share them here on the blog!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Who Were The Old Wives Anyways?

2012-01-20T11:02:00.000-05:00

There are a lot of Old Wives' Tales about pregnancy, birth and babies. And the whole time you are pregnant, you hear all of them at some point.

Most of them are about the sex of the baby. This seems to be a big point of conversation. I don't know how those women wait until delivery to find out if the little one is a boy or girl. I imagine they get real sick of hearing all of these old wives' tales the whole time (because I was sure tired of them for 20 weeks!).

Here are some of the most popular ones I heard:

Craving sweets means a GIRL: This one was TRUE for me. Normally, I am a "salty snacker." Pre-pregnancy, I craved salt and vinegar chips, pickles and french fries. But when I was pregnant, all I wanted was ice cream sundaes, pears, trail mix (with far too many M&M's!) and Icees.

Heartbeat above 140 (beats per minute) means a GIRL: More or less TRUE for me. When we heard our little baby's heartbeat at 12 weeks, it was 140. On the dot. We asked the doctor if he'd like to guess the sex of the baby based on that heartbeat. His answer? "Sure, but I'm only right 50% of the time." Har de har har, gynecology humor.

How you carry the baby - Horizontally is a GIRL, Right out in front is a BOY: TRUE for me. I appeared pregnant from every angle. I didn't just have a baby "bump," I had a baby "bulge."

With Katherine at the beach for July 4th. Oh, so pregnant.

Acne - Bad acne means GIRL and that she will be beautiful (because she's stealing all of Mama's beauty): TRUE! Oh, the acne that I had (okay, fine, still have...). I like to consider it my first real mother-sacrifice because my baby really is good looking.

Morning Sickness - GIRL: FALSE! Didn't throw up once. Had nausea once or twice before bed, but it wasn't anything a cookie didn't cure.

Heartburn means a head full of hair: FALSE! Well, maybe it's true, but it's not required. My sweet girl was born with a very surprising amount of hair. It's usually the first thing people comment on when they see her. And after 2 and 1/2 months, most of the hair is still in place. (We'll ignore that teeny bald patch on the back!) Then, everyone asks how bad my heartburn must have been during pregnancy. And, believe it or not, I didn't have any! And I still enjoyed my jalapenos and spicy salsa without incident.

Mimi on January 1st at 2 months old! Still so much hair!

So, just like all of the unsolicited baby advice that comes your way, just ignore the Old Wives' tales. It's the only way to keep you sane throughout the pregnancy.

But will I now be one of those crazy women who tries to predict the sex of your baby? Oh, you betcha.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Memories of The Salty Nut

2012-01-06T21:08:00.000-05:00

Did you hear? The Salty Nut burned! It's been all over the news and Facebook is about to implode from all the status updates about it, so if you haven't heard, your internet must be down or something.

Now, it's been several years since I darkened the doors of that fine establishment, but it still has a sweet place in my heart. It was my go-to bar in grad school and I spent many a night throwing peanut shells on the floor, drinking Bud Light and admiring former frat boys in visors (I should add that this was mostly Pre-Stan...).

I loved the doorman. I loved when I wasn't there on a Thursday night, he would ask me where I'd been. (Although if that was happening now, I'd be more embarrassed than impressed. But I was 23 at the time, so it was awesome!)

My favorite St. Patrick's Day was sitting on the back porch watching all of the debauchery and drama unfolding with the undergrads (and more than likely, underaged) in front of Pavlov's until late in the night with Emily.

I have a great memory of my first hamburger there with Kathryn. Somehow we had been going to The Nut for over a year and had yet to actually eat anything besides the roasted peanuts. And we were both pleasantly surprised at how delicious the burger was! And when we were completely stuffed and satisfied and they took away our baskets...we both dived back into the roasted peanuts on the table. Why is it that we can't resist free food sitting on the table??

I loved the thrill of getting a good outside table on a perfect spring day. So what if that meant getting there at 3:30 in the afternoon? This was obviously before I had a real job with real responsibilities to get to the next morning. These days I'd have to take several personal days just to recover from an afternoon of drinking. And I have a baby to take care of now. Can't forget that.

I hope that they will rebuild the Salty Nut. It was ideal for everyone who is in that part of life after college and before babies.

With Caroline, I think after a football game (which makes sense, because it looks very crowded at The Nut). The real question is - why I am holding my wallet and where is my purse? Was I confused that my wallet was a clutch? Was that cool in 2009?

With Doug and Emily at my favorite people watching table (right by the bar, near the door). Does Emily's head look unusually large? Just sayin...

A big group shot on the back porch. We were so excited to be wearing sundresses, but I think it was actually pretty cold that night!

I think I just may have to sleep in my navy blue Salty Nut t-shirt tonight just for ol' times sake!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

We have a smile!

2011-12-22T09:58:00.001-05:00

The Fourth didn't believe me.He said it was gas.

But I think we have a smile!

With her 1st Angel Ornament

Okay, more of a smirk than a smile.

Same chair. Different outfit. But proof that it wasn't just a one day fluke.

Somewhere between a smile and a cry. Baby has some emotional issues.

I like to think she's just saving her smiles for me.

Of course, she also seems to save other activities just for me, too: projectile spit-up, blow-out diapers, piercing screams right in my ear and scratches from her ~~talons~~ tiny fingernails. The Fourth has managed to avoid all of those fun activities so far. But if it means I'm getting smiles, I'll take it!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Baby Clothes With No Purpose

2011-12-16T08:00:00.000-05:00

Lounging on her Boppy.

I was hanging out with the baby today and admiring just how cute she looked in her sweet Kissy Kissy gown.

The gown has everything you want in baby clothes: It's soft. It has the sweet scalloped edge you only see on baby clothes. It's easy to snap off and on. It has the little sleeves that fold over her jagged fingernails.

It has a tiny pocket on the chest.

Wait, a pocket?!

Why would a baby need a tiny pocket?! Is she carrying around her credit card? Does she use it to store pens for ready access (and does it come with tiny pocket protectors to prevent ink spills?)? Does she keep her car keys in it? Maybe spare change?

I really can't think of a single reason why a baby would need a pocket. I even tried to put her pacifier in it, but it was too small. At 6 weeks old, a pacifier is really the only accessory she has at this point. (Well, except for hairbows. With that much hair, I'm taking full advantage of hairbows already!)

Of course, about 90% of my sorority tees had a chest pocket that had no real purpose, so maybe she's just preparing for a closet full of party tees.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Is It Just My Baby?

2011-12-15T11:53:00.000-05:00

I imagine every new mom feels like this, but I can't help but wonder if my baby is a freak.

I mean, a cute, snuggly, wonderful freak. But a freak baby, nonetheless.

There are just some weirdo things that she does that I can't imagine any other baby does:

Stare absently into space - What is she thinking about? Winter fashion? Barometric pressure? Farm animals? The theory of relativity? Her next meal? Who knows? (But, if I was a gambler, I'd put my money on the last one; she's a little piggie!)

Possibly composing beautiful a symphony in her mind. Or just thinking about food.

Moves like one of those wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube men - I realize that she doesn't have great control over her arms, but how do they always wind up slapping her in the face and scratching her cheeks, eyes, eyebrows, forehead, everywhere! And after a particularly violent slap to the face, she'll look at me like I made her do that. I promise, little girl, I had nothing to do with that. And the girl can break out of a swaddle. I've tried every recommended blanket and watched every video, and she can still wriggle those little arms out, especially as we approach feeding time.

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Men. She often looks like that little red one on the bottom.

Quick healing - She'll have these scratches all over her face (from the wacky waving flailing arms, see above) and, I swear, they will heal within the day. The Fourth believes this is from the antibodies she's getting from nursing. But if that's the case, why do I have paper cuts that don't seem to heal for a week if I have all of these super human antibodies?!

Dirty fingernails - For a baby that spends most of her time indoors, sweet girl has some major dirt under her tiny nails! Has she been gardening? Working as a freelance mechanic? I have resorted to using her soft bristle hairbrush to scrub her tiny nails in the tub. It only somewhat helps.

Fingernails - after a thorough cleaning.

Ear hair - Oh, I hope this black, furry hair lining her ears falls out! And soon. She'll never get a date looking like an Ewok.

Potentially has bipolar disorder - She goes from sweet cooing, to hysterical crying, to fast asleep, to staring off in space and then back again. All within 5 minutes. She has about as much control on her emotions as she does her arms.

Crying. I see this face a lot.

Moves her head like Stevie Wonder - This one cracks me up. She will shake her head back and forth in a figure 8 and looks just like him! It makes me break into "Isn't She Lovely" every time!

Every day with this little girl makes me laugh and wonder what's in store for the future. What new weirdo things are in store for us?!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Groundhog Day of Dresses

2011-12-12T17:40:00.000-05:00

I discovered the Ravon convertible dress on Ideeli last year and am proud to say that I have been able to wear it several times - much to the relief of The Fourth and my wallet. Basically it's about 9 feet of fabric that you can tie a hundred different ways. Halter, strapless, one-shoulder, sleeves, whatever! Of course, it's not always easy tying the dang thing. I recommend at least 30 minutes, a glass of wine and, preferably, a friend to help you do it. I usually have to tie it 4 or 5 times before I get it right. I bought the navy one, thinking that navy is the new black. Classic, but interesting. (Like me...Ha!)

First, I wore it to the Holiday Market Preview Party in 2010. One shoulder - so far my favorite way. I also really liked my hair that night. However, I have not be able to repeat either the way I tied the dress or how I did my hair since. Figures.

With Ashley at Holiday Market

I encouraged my sister-in-law to buy the red one this year and she agreed as long as I would always tie it for her. Fair enough.

And when my beautiful dress from Rent The Runway did not fit, I ~~begged~~ asked Graham if I could wear her red dress. Before she had even worn it. And being a sweet friend, she said yes! As long as I kept my promise to tie hers when she wore it. Deal!

I wore the red dress to Holiday Market Preview Party this year. I did a pretty basic tie, but with extra ruching across the mid section because, well, I did just have a baby 4 weeks ago!

The dress was also easily disassembled for pumping half way through the party. TMI? Possible.

And just a few days after the Preview Party, we headed to the St. Andrews Society Tartan Ball. Graham requested the one-shoulder look (which, I must say, looked pretty great on her).

Me, Graham and Emily

And I went for sleeves since I had some weird bruise on my arm that needed to be covered up. Where did I get the bruise? I have no idea, but The Fourth would like everyone to know that he is not responsible. I was wearing the Douglass tartan, so you can't really see the way I tied it, but you get the idea. And, I must say, the navy looks pretty good with the tartan!

Me and Big Daddy.

Me and The Fourth.

The Fam! The Fourth, Me, Big Daddy, The Fifth & Pearman (The Fifth's girlfriend)

So I'd say I've already gotten my money out of the dress (and Graham's, too!), but I still plan on wearing it a few more times! So proud of myself.

Now if I just had an event to go to... Anyone want to throw a black tie party?

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

First Trip to the Beach!

2011-12-09T08:00:00.000-05:00

The Fourth and I are already trying to instill our love for the beach in to Sweet Mimi. I'd say she's well on her way to loving the sand and surf as much as we do!

Family walk down the beach! Mimi's loving it, I'm sure.

We spent a gorgeous Thanksgiving weekend at the beach and made sure that Mimi got some good sun time.

Have infant carrier. Will travel.

I made sure to get in the sun, too. On our walk over the boardwalk, Big Daddy looked down at my legs (which were sporting shorts! In November!) and asked me why I was wearing tights. Um...those aren't tights, Dad. Those are my frighteningly pale legs. Thanks, though.

A picture of me and the Sweet Girl. Making sure that my white legs weren't in the picture to avoid overexposure to the lens.

I'd say Mimi is pretty excited about sporting a bathing suit in just a few months! Her mother? Notsomuch.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Holiday Market Hilarity

2011-12-08T13:32:00.000-05:00

Well, we survived another year of Holiday Market! It's always a fun time and a culmination of months of hard work to make some money for the Junior League. Not everyone has as much fun in her placement as I do, but what can I say? It's for the kids...

First there was the Preview Party. I had originally hoped to wear a dress from Rent The Runway, but when it came in on Tuesday, I realized that my chest was, well, too big for the beautiful Robert Rodriguez gown. But how mad could I really get about that? And with a full refund credit to use later (no expiration date either!), I am planning on getting another dress at some point for some fabulous party. I'll just have to account for my post-baby ta-tas.

The beautiful gown I didn't get to wear. Sigh.

Me (in my back up dress) and Sarah.

Me and The Fourth. And, no, that's not a diamond stud reflecting in his ear.

And, of course, there was fun play in the Cantey Building, including wheelchair races.

Natalie wins in the Fabric 101 Wheelchair! (Sorry for the grainy cell phone pic. My camera battery had long died at this point!)

Leftover champagne and delirium from being in the Cantey Building for a week may have been a factor...

And there were middle school giggles over a misprinted sign.

The food tastes like whaaa?

For future reference, "association" should really be abbreviated "Assoc." Just saying.

And Mimi was a great sport spending her 4th week of life at the Fairgrounds. In fact, I think she was there enough to have earned placement credit! What a good little Junior Leaguer!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

One Month Old!

2011-12-06T19:32:00.001-05:00

In the past month...

I have survived on less sleep than I ever thought possible. I will never never never complain about 5 hours of sleep again.

I've learned what Lanolin is. And have developed an unnatural daily need for it.

I have heard my little 7 pound girl poot so loudly that it startles me, The Fourth and Bailey.

I have thoroughly enjoyed Pinot Grigio again.

So happy to be a month old on December 1st!

I have unrealistically tried to put on prepregnancy clothes.

And then put my pregnancy jeans back on and gleefully ate without hesitation.

I have made plans to diet in January.

Probably giggling at how ridiculous Mom is.

I have thanked The Fourth for getting cable again...especially DVR.

I have watched hundreds of episodes of "How I Met Your Mother," "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia," "The Office," and "TMZ."

Love that side look. I get that one a lot.

I have enjoyed many meals made by friends who just show up at my front doorstep with hot delicious food.

I have learned how to get poop, spit up and Maalox (baby has some violent reflux) out of our clothes. Mostly.

All in all, it's been a wonderful month. And I can't believe we get to keep her!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Post-Partum Love

2011-11-25T11:39:00.001-05:00

Burping the baby. How funny is that expression?

I have been known to carry on about things. My latest? That I made it through 10 months of pregnancy without stretch marks! Oh, how I carried on to anyone who would listen about how pretty my pregnant belly looked and how I faithfully applied cocoa butter to escape those icky marks of motherhood. And when I had to get a C-Section, I lamented the fact that I would now have a scar (gasp!) and ruined my otherwise mark-free belly. The Fourth listened to all of this and even heard me say things like, "I'll be back wearing 2 piece bathing suits next summer!"

And then ...I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror the other day getting out of the shower. And right there on my side were stretch marks! And not even light-barely-can-see-them marks. For real stretch marks. The "Before" picture in a Mederma ad type of stretch marks. Ahhh! I was so embarrassed! And then I realized how many people I had bragged to about my "perfectly marked free belly" and was even more mortified.

It took me two days to 'fess up to The Fourth that I was, in fact, wrong and I did, in fact, have stretch marks.

And you know what he said?

"I already know."

Wait a minute, now. The Fourth had listened to me boast to anyone within earshot for weeks now and he remained silent the entire time?! Never called me out that I was completely erroneous?! Never even rolled his eyes during my crow-fests?! Never corrected me in front of someone?! All for the sake of letting me believe that I had better skin than I really do?!

If that's not true love, then I don't know what is. It may not be in the marriage vows how fragile the ego is and how important it is to build up your wife during her crazy post-partum days. But it probably should be.

And The Fourth deserves an award for that one.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

PS: Since I figured you didn't want pictures of my stretch marks, I thought I'd add cute pictures of Mimi. I'm glad she's so cute; it makes even stretch marks worth it.

Early morning photo shoot on the changing table in her Monkey Pajamas!

Asking The Fourth to plleeeassee let her be a Blue Hose!

Prescription Confusion

2011-11-23T20:20:00.000-05:00

After the unintended C-Section, I got an unintended infection at my incision. There was a lot of crying, and not just from the newborn.

And so I got put on an antibiotic - Cephalexin - that would clear my infection, wreck havoc on my gut and make my breastfeeding baby fussy. All things you want to have just days after giving birth.

But like a good little patient, I took my medicine like I'm supposed to and only forgot my dose once (I somehow ended up with an extra capsule a day after I was supposed to be done. Just goes to show that pharmacists are terrible at taking medicine!)

And then a few days later, our beloved dog Bailey got some yucky wound on his side. And off to the vet he went and came back with a bandage and an antibiotic.

As I was giving Bailey his morning dose and taking my own, I realized I mixed up our capsules! After trying to figure out if I should call my doctor, the vet, the Poison Control Center or all three, I realized that it didn't matter. The capsules were exactly the same! I checked his bottle and sure enough, Bailey was on Cephalexin, too!

Cephalexin 500mg - Same Capsules for People and Dogs

I don't know if I should be amazed, disturbed or comforted (Bailey was on a higher dose than me; I like to think he weighs more than I do).

We are both doing better now, thanks for asking. My infection is completely cleared and Bailey is still wearing his bandage. Of course, The Fourth didn't want to pay up for another vet visit, so he did a little wound care himself.

Poor Old Man.

Why, yes. That is duct tape.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Worth the Wait

2011-11-17T17:38:00.000-05:00

My original birth plan went a little like this:

* Give birth on or around my due date of October 19th.
* Have a natural childbirth -- without an epidural.
* Avoid a C-Section at all costs.
* Shower and straighten my hair before leaving for the hospital so that I looked cute in those immediate post-partum pictures.

I really didn't think it was too much to ask.

And then October 19th came and went. And I tried everything to induce labor -- spicy chili for dinner (on 3 different occasions), went on loong walks (I went to every shopping center in the Columbia area to walk for hours!), ate eggplant, pineapple, sat on a bouncy ball. Nothing worked. For 13 days.

So the doctors decided that Mimi had overstayed her welcome and I was set to induce Tuesday, November 1st at 6am. November?! I was supposed to have an October baby! I had 2 Halloween outfits for her! An an induction wasn't exactly the natural childbirth I was hoping for. The good news was I could wake up early that morning to shower and straighten my hair. So I had that going for me.

6:00am - Let's get this started! See my pretty straight hair?

We got there bright-eyed and bushy tailed and they started Pitocin and broke my water right away. So I pretty sure we'd have a baby within a couple hours.

And then time went by. Hours and hours. And every time the doctor came in, she broke the news that I had made little to no progress. And the contractions were a minute apart. What the heck?!

The Fourth took this picture of the epidural poster. Just as reminder that it was still available.

The Fourth started advocating for an Epidural right away.

And then it was 2pm and I was still nowhere near having this baby. And the contractions became zero minutes apart. So I broke down and asked for the epidural. I think The Fourth cheered -- I'm not sure, though, since I was near hallucinating from the pain. It should be noted that getting the epidural hurt something terrible, but within minutes I resuming normal conversation. Drugs are a miracle; you would think that as a pharmacist that I already knew that.

More hours went by and still very little progress was being made. I only got to 5 cm dilated (I needed to get to 10 cm for those of you are wonderfully naive to the labor and delivery process). Then the conversation turned to having a C-Section. So far I was only achieving 25% of my birth plan (my hair was still straight, thank goodness). But my stomach was growling and I was exhausted and ready to see this baby already, so I decided to go for the ~~butchering~~ C-Section.

On the table. Smiling because the wait is almost over!

My straight hair was put in a hair cap and The Fourth put on scrubs. I was wheeled in and within 10 minutes we had a baby girl!

She's here! And she's perfect!

Mary McKenzie "Mimi" was born at 6:10pm. She was 6 lbs 13oz and 20 3/4 inches. And she surprised us with head full of dark hair! She was the cutest thing I'd ever seen. And she didn't look all banged up from the birth canal -- one benefit of the C-Section, I guess.

Our new family. Doesn't The Fourth look totally cute in his scrubs?

Happy to finally be in the world with us. We're happy too, Baby Girl!

So my birth plan was pretty much thrown out of the window, but for what we got in the end, I don't really mind. I have a feeling this little girl is going to make this Type A personality Momma change her plans constantly in the coming years.

And I'm okay with that.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Greek Festival Time

2011-09-15T07:00:00.000-04:00

It's going to be an exciting weekend. It will be filled with feta cheese, lamb and honey flavored desserts -- The Columbia Greek Festival!

Of all food categories, Greek food is my absolute favorite. If I'm trying to decide what to order at a restaurant and feta cheese is listed in one of the entrees, I'll most likely order it. I even buy feta cheese at Sam's in the ginormous container. One time at a dinner party, there was a conversation of what happens to feta cheese when it goes bad (apparently it turns pink). I had never seen feta cheese go bad in my own fridge (but have been known to let everything else get pretty funky in the fridge).

So I'm pretty pumped about some delicious meals at the Greek Festival. Why, I did say "meals" {plural}. I will be going Thursday night with some friend girls and then again on Friday for birthday lunch with Big Daddy. I plan on ordering spanakopita (or as they call it at Grecian Gardens, "Cheese Puffs"):

Possibly a gyro:

And probably some Greek Potatoes.

And then I'll hit the desserts. It's amazing to me to have so many delicious desserts at the festival, most of which don't even have chocolate! I love the baklava and the shredded wheat looking dessert the most. I like to think there are hundreds of little Greek women baking away right now in preparation for this weekend. And I don't plan on sending them home with any leftovers!

I'll let you know how much I eat. And then what diet plan I'll have to implement the rest of the week.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Birthday Blues

2011-09-14T14:54:00.000-04:00

It's my birthday on Friday. And usually around this time of year, I am counting down days (and hours and minutes), making elaborate plans and picking out party outfits for a birthday celebration. But this year I'm just not feeling it.

It's not because of my age - I'll be 29, which is not scary for me - but I'm not exactly sure what's caused my birthday apathy. Have I been spending more time counting down days (and hours and minutes) until my due date instead of my birthday? Yes. Do I have to work until 9pm on my birthday... and the following Saturday and Sunday? Yes, sadly. Do I think I'd be more excited about my birthday if I had some delicious Pinot Grigio and sushi to look forward to? Yes, definitely.

The Fourth says he is shocked and more than a little confused about my disinterest this year. He should know. I'm usually bombarding him with daily countdown texts and websites of pretty jewelry for gift ideas. The only thing I've asked for this year is an ice cream cake. (It should be noted - I still want a present from The Fourth. I just haven't filled his inbox with ideas.)

So, I can't help but wonder...Has my birthday fanaticism gone away for good? I hope that by my big birthday next year I'll be ready for an epic party. But who knows? Maybe this is just a sign of maturity. (Although, really? I just kind of doubt that.)

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Maternity Wear

2011-09-13T13:46:00.003-04:00

As I enter the homestretch of this pregnancy, I'm getting pretty excited to sleep on my stomach again, have feeling in my fingers, and wear my old clothes. But I will definitely miss some of the clothes I've been wearing. Especially pants without buttons and zippers.

The Gap Maternity pants (recommended by Catherine) are amazing and absolutely essential. I bought the black and khaki ones and wear them constantly at work. And they came in "Short," which was one less expense at the tailor. My only complaint is that the bottom hem fell out of the black ones and the hem around the stretchy top fell out of the khaki ones. I washed on the hand-washables cycle (since I don't have any intention of truly hand-washing) and line-dried, but I guess the constant wear wore them out. So I ended up at the tailor anyways.

Gap's Demi Panel Perfect Trouser Pants: (not my heiney; wish it was though)

Gap's Demi Panel Hip Slung Flare Pants:

I also got a lot of cute things at Motherhood Maternity. I was pleasantly surprised at the style and price there and stocked up on some clothes that lasted me all summer. I am usually a strict rule-follower, but you may just see me in some linen after Labor Day. It's still in the 90's outside and my linen pants are elastic. So, there.

Long, flowy brown skirt from Motherhood Maternity: (I may be pushing it by wearing this skirt since I'm barely over 5 feet. But I like how it flows around my feet when I walk! And I don't wear it with those tall heels like the model. Flats are a way of life now.)

Lots of soft tees from Motherhood Maternity: (Would have liked to have about 100 of these, but couldn't justify a $20 t-shirt for just a few months)

Maxi Dress from Destination Maternity: (Oh, how I have loved the maxi dress. It gives me a little draft during the summer, but still covers my tree-trunk legs.)

Yoga Pants from Motherhood Maternity: (Love love love love these. Will be wearing post-partum and beyond. And I've actually been taking yoga, so I feel validated in buying them.)

I also had a lot of cute tops and dresses that I lived in. But why do almost all maternity tops require a camisole underneath? Do the manufacturers not realize how blazing hot it is to wear 2 shirts in August?! I tried a couple times to wear dresses sans-camisole, but ended up just feeling indecent with my new, larger-without-surgery chest.

One thing I would not recommend is the Bella Band (or other similar product):

These bands are supposed to allow you to wear your regular pants unbuttoned with the band holding them up. Who are these people kidding? The band just rolled up to my chest and my zipper flew down. My suggestion to those who are newly pregnant? Just suck it up, but the maternity pants, and love the fact that you are allowed to wear elastic for a couple of months.

Now that it is September and I only have 5 weeks left, I'm pretty low on clothes that fit and are fall-ish. And I have no intentions of buying new clothes. So...does anyone have a muumuu I can borrow for a month?

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

My Own Baby Story

2011-09-06T22:12:00.000-04:00

The Fourth and I are back to the world of cable. As NetFlix kept increasing their prices and AT&T U-Verse kept getting cheaper, we decided to cancel the NetFlix and go to the dark side. So now we're back to hundreds of channels, but it's been so long since we had cable, we don't even know what sort of TV shows are on these days. Much less find the channel somewhere hidden in the 800 we have.

So we're still mostly watching Antiques Roadshow on PBS and How I Met Your Mother reruns. But I did manage to find TLC one day and watched several back to back episodes of "A Baby Story." Probably not the best thing for an 8 and 1/2 month pregnant woman to watch.

But I did learn a lot. Such as:

* I don't want a water birth in a baby swimming pool in my living room. No negotiation. I don't think The Fourth will argue with me on this one.

* Labor may be painful, but I freak out every time they get out that epidural needle. I'm still holding on to my fairy tale dream of having a "natural birth" in order to avoid that needle from my nightmares.

* There seems to be a lot of sweating involved. Which makes me wonder how these women on Facebook look impossibly cute in the pictures they post 0.6 seconds after the baby is born. Is there a hair and make-up lady in the L&D ward at Baptist Hospital?

* How can something that feels so ginormous in my belly now look so tiny once it's in the world?

* Babies are sort of freaky looking. It's a good thing the endorphins start revving up during labor because it seems like it'd be hard to fall in love with a slimy, wrinkly pink squirrel. But I guess when it's your slimy, wrinkly pink squirrel, you have an immediate attachment.

* I love to see the Daddies talk about the little babies. It's just so sweet. I can't wait to hear what The Fourth has to say about all of this.

Maybe I should just start watching "What Not To Wear." I think I might learn some better lessons from Clinton and Stacy.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Baby Smith...A Ginger?

2011-08-23T18:18:00.002-04:00

There has been some recent chatter about whether Baby Smith will be a redhead. At first I completely dismissed this prediction, but now I'm starting to flip through my old Genetics notebook from college to see if this is a real possibility.

The Fourth's paternal grandmother is a redhead. My paternal grandmother was a redhead. And according to Wikipedia, the red hair gene is carried on the HCL2 gene on chromosome 4. Hm, confusing. Anyone remember how to draw a Punnett Square? Well, since I haven't had an extensive genetic map done of Baby Smith (yet!), we'll just have to guess that there is a possibility that we're both carrying the recessive gene.

And what would be wrong with a Ginger? Nothing, in my opinion. I'm fairly pale and very freckly, so I feel prepared to slather on 50 SPF several times a day on our child. {Really, I plan on doing this regardless of her hair color.}

And I know several very cute redheads:

Emily has pretty red hair, porcelain skin and a penchant for large sunglasses.

Aunt Connie also has a good color red hair and somehow still manages to get tan in the summertime. What's with that?

So I don't think having a redhead would be all that bad. And I would be glad to be doing our part to prevent the extinction of redheads, predicted to occur in 100 years.

Now, if she has curly red hair, we might all be in trouble. I have no idea how to tame curls and she may end up resembling Carrot Top; a frightening possibility.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Summer Movie Round Up

2011-08-22T07:22:00.000-04:00

I rarely go to the movies. {A date night for me and The Fourth usually involves dinner and cocktails and skipping the movie all together.} But this summer I have been to more movies than I have in the past few years combined. I think it's the ultra air conditioned theater and candy (sneaked in, of course) that has drawn me there this summer.

Some were with my book club. Some were with my favorite 10 year old. And, I just realized, all but one were based on books.

So here's my Summer Movie Review (not in chronological, highest rating or any other kind of order. Actually, they're just in the order that I downloaded the pictures.):

Mr. Popper's Penguins: I usually find Jim Carrey mildly amusing and mostly annoying. This movie pretty much lived up to that expectation. But the penguins were way cute. And I enjoyed Fun Dip while watching the movie, which put me in an all-around good mood. 3 of 5 Drinks.

Bridesmaids: What 20-something girl didn't go see this movie this summer? While some parts were hilarious and pegged the woes of a bridesmaid dead on, there were other parts there were just too crude. I guess they didn't want to get put in the "Chick Flick" category. But then why play a Wilson Phillips concert at the end? 3 of 5 Drinks.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2: A perfect ending to an amazing series of books and movies. The Fifth and I sat through our last Harry Potter movie together and enjoyed every piece of popcorn (and refills) and every minute of the movie. 5 of 5 drinks.

Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer: Cute movie and made me miss books with characters like Judy Moody, Ramona Quimby and Junie B. Jones. Also? Urkel was the teacher in the movie. Took me an hour and a half to realize that one. 4 of 5 drinks.

Water for Elephants: When I read this book, all I could think was, "This would make an amazing movie!" And the movie had all of the imagery, colors and costumes I hoped it would. My only disappointment was how heavy the plot was. It seemed to leave out all the happy moments from the book and only focus on the animal and circus employee abuse. The book was better than the movie on this one. 3 of 5 drinks.

The Help: Of course, with every blog on the planet buzzing about this movie, there's nothing I really need to add. I loved it and it was the perfect complement to the book (the only other movie I've said that about was "Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood").

Didn't that caramel cake look good in the movie? I can tell you with full authority...it is. 'Cause I've had those delicious Caroline's Cakes at Holiday Market before!

There are still several books-to-movies I want to see in the coming months: Jane Eyre (I guess this one went straight to DVD?), The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (I saw the Swedish one, but reading subtitles made me exhausted!), The Invention of Hugo Cabret and The Hunger Games. Maybe I'll actually make it to more movies in 2011 and 2012.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Goodbye Sweet Mustang

2011-08-21T08:45:00.000-04:00

I knew it was going to happen one day. Putting a infant car seat in the backseat of a Mustang just wasn't practical. But that didn't mean the day wasn't bittersweet.

And that day happened this week - we sold my Mustang!

I got my shiny, brand new silver Mustang back in January of 2000. I came home to find her sitting in the driveway and just about had a coronary.

Big Daddy had bought the car for me when my Mom was out of town on a work conference. I was supposed to get a used Saturn coupe. {Big Daddy loves his only daughter.} So, of course, we had to dance to "Mustang Sally" for our Father-Daughter dance at my wedding.

The Fourth handled the whole transaction, but it went exactly as I hoped. That sweet Mustang now belongs to a very happy 16 year old. I just hope she enjoys her first car as much as I did!

Now, my biggest concern. How do I get my vanity plate (MARY D) transferred to my new car?!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

31 Week Update

2011-08-20T20:14:00.003-04:00

Celebrating 3rd wedding anniversary with The Fourth. He made Beef Wellington. And it was so good, I renewed my vows to him right there at the dining room table.

Remember at 14 weeks I thought I was showing?

Ha.

And then there was the time when I was in the maternity store at 12 weeks pregnant and tried on the "Add 3 Months Bump" and thought to myself, "I doubt I'll be this big."

Ha.

So here I am at 31 weeks, creeping up on 8 months pregnant and I think to myself, "This must be as big as I'll get right? I can't even see my feet!"

(I can hear you "Ha.")

But I have a feeling this is not the end. And I need to just suck it up and get a pedicure. (Trying to bribe The Fourth to paint my toenails ended with an eyeroll and change of subject.)

What other great pregnancy things are happening these days?

* Lots of delicious late summer cantaloupe, watermelon and peaches.

* Incredibly thirsty all the time. Gulping water and, my recent favorite, flavored seltzer water in a wine glass. (It should be noted, I have already told The Fourth to plan on bringing champagne - the real kind, with alcohol - to the labor and delivery room.)

* Lots of tinkling resulting from those first two points. I guess getting up 4 - 5 times a night is just good practice for what's to come.

* Still some weird symptoms like dry eyes and carpal tunnel. Both of which made it virtually impossible to catch up on my Google Reader on my phone. And why I read/scanned over 300 blog posts today. Rockin' Saturday afternoon.

* Thick, lustrous hair. Love this one. My once prevalent split-ends are gone and my hair is so well behaved now! This lasts forever, yes?

* Some great baby movement. She's an active little one and, it seems, she likes sweets as much as her Mama. Also? She gets the hiccups, which is impossibly cute. I can't wait to see her hiccup in person if it's this cute in the womb.

* Nursery Progress is...slow, but steady. It mostly seems like a bunch of swiping of the debit card. I'll do a full update soon.

9 weeks and counting; is it really this close?!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Watermelon Granita

2011-08-07T08:10:00.001-04:00

This summer, I signed up for a CSA (community-supported agriculture; This is the one we picked and just love it!) and have been getting delicious fruits and veggies delivered to my door each week. It's pretty awesome.

Last week, we got a monster watermelon. But it just wasn't quite as sweet as we wanted (have we been spoiled by the genetically modified fruit? Possibly.) So, I did a quick search of some watermelon recipes and found one that will now be in my summer recipe regular rotation!

Watermelon Granita

4 cups (or so) of chopped up watermelon, seeded
1/2 cup (or so) of sugar
Juice from a lemon. Or lime. Or whatever is in your fridge. (For me, it was 1/2 lemon and 3/4 lime)

Puree in food processor. Poor into cookie sheet. Carefully put in freezer. Wipe up spilled mess since you are extra clumsy while pregnant and have carpal tunnel.

After an hour, scrape with fork. After another hour, scrape again.

It's like a heavenly frozen watermelon with just enough sweet and tart. And it's worth trying to figure out how to buy some dry ice to keep this in a cooler and eat on the beach. I'll let you know how that turns out.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Happy Birthday America!

2011-08-06T19:51:00.005-04:00

(Why, yes, The Fourth has lost weight. He looks thin and tan, doesn't he? I however, am freckly and expanding. Ah, pregnancy.)

This Fourth of July we celebrated at the beach with sparklers, sunburns and, most appropriately, American Unity.

(We weren't really trying to spell anything, but my "P" is pretty darn good isn't it?)

It all started when we asked if anyone wanted to come to our quaint 4 bedroom, 2 bathroom beach house for the holiday weekend.

And then everyone said yes. And asked if they could bring friends.

Since The Fourth and I live for entertaining and partying, we quickly said yes. To everyone.

And so we spent the weekend with 13 people in our suddenly very tiny house, but no one seemed to complain (I imagine the beer helped).

I only knew 62% of the people who came, but that didn't stop me from making new friends. And they came from all over the country -- Chicago, New York, New Jersey. And isn't embracing our American brethren what the Fourth of July is all about? And, as it turns out, we're not all that different. They like to sit on the beach, eat lots of fried food and playing ping pong based drinking games. Just like us!

However, there were some cultural differences that were pointed out, mostly involving food. They made a trip to Lizard's Thicket while in Columbia and, while they did enjoy some "Country Cookin'," they did not know the term "Meat and Three." Once explained that it was a restaurant where you can order a meat and choice of 3 vegetables, there was a resulting conversation how most of the "vegetables" on the list were not, in fact, vegetables. Macaroni and cheese? Starch and dairy. Country skillet apples? Fruit. Jell-O. Yeah, I'll admit that is a strange one to be on the vegetable menu.

Also? Our guests had never experienced the glory that is boiled peanuts. Or pimento cheese. I was more than happy to provide these treats and let them enjoy some of the South's best culinary treats. And everyone seemed to like them, too! (And if you really want to change your life - zap a bowlful of Palmetto Cheese in the microwave until creamy and warm. You'll never eat cold pimento cheese again.)

I have managed to stay sunburn-free all summer (it's all about the reapply, people!), but some of our guests were not so lucky. In fact, Geoff got so burned, it ended up being one of those burns that just got worse and worse as the night went on. You know the kind I'm talking about. Sort of purple by the time we ate dinner and blistered by bedtime. At one point, he was squirming and trying to find the least painful position and ended up looking more like a pregnant woman. So, naturally, I snuck up beside him for a pregnancy pose picture.

Poor Geoff didn't even have a clue why I suddenly appeared beside him in my most pregnant stance. But it does make for an amazingly funny picture.

Overall, it was a pretty amazing Fourth of July. And I'm ready to start planning some trips around the country to visit my new friends and see what sort of regional foods I need to try!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Flashback Friday

2011-07-15T14:32:00.002-04:00

Happy Birthday to Matt aka Moose aka MoosiePie!

Matt & The Fourth circa 1998 (also before they discovered gourmet food and Coors Light).

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

A Cute Picture

2011-07-06T07:06:00.001-04:00

In a rare moment where the stars and planets aligned just right, some of my favorite friends in the world all managed to be in the same town at the same time. (And, yes, it made us all realize all much we used to take advantage of this time together.) We got together for ham biscuits, mimosas and gossip and tried to condense the last 6 months apart in a couple hours. And then I made everyone take a group picture.

Thoughts on this super cute picture:

1. My camera has been so fuzzy lately. It's possible I messed with the settings. Or left the lens open in my purse. Anything is possible with me and electronics.

2. When setting the camera on self-timer, make sure to center everyone first. Although that is a nice picture of Gretchen's couch.

3. Anna (in blue) had a baby 2 weeks ago. And looks amazing. If I didn't like her so much, I would hate her.

4. Probably should have turned off Kathie Lee and Hoda in the background.

5. I love that Kiki (back row) appears to be avoiding the babies as much as possible. She is even willing to cut off her body from the picture instead of standing in the perfect little spot between the babies.

6. Gretchen (in black shorts, holding a baby) is very tan because she has spent her maternity leave vacationing at the beach and the mountains. Is it any wonder we're friends?

7. Emily (redhead, black dress) can completely pull off the "arm on hip" pose. I continue to try and continue to look like a rejected cheerleader.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Pregnancy Update

2011-07-05T20:02:00.000-04:00

A little update on the gestating:

How far along? 25 weeks (6 months)

Showing? Oh yeah. Here's some pics of me and the bump from a couple weeks ago at the beach.

Me and The Fourth, with his visor suspiciously low:

Picture of me and Emily:

Hm. Maybe I should stop taking pictures of myself with girls who could be on the cover of Shape Magazine. Just a thought.

Boy or Girl? It's a GIRL! Long live smocked dresses!!

Name? Well, of course we had a boy name before the ultrasound, but no girl names. Figures. So, I had to harass The Fourth all the way home so we could figure out a name that day.

So we (meaning just me) started Googling family trees in search for a really good family name.

The final decision? Mary McKenzie, and we'll call her "Mimi." I love a good nickname!

Recent Cravings: Icees from Burger King (these are just amazing in this heat), Banana Split mix from The Fresh Market, fresh peaches by the bowlful. Hello sweets, you have kicked salty's butt this pregnancy.

Strange things happening to my body: Swollen feet and cankles, Carpal Tunnel in my hands, acne still raging

Nursery Progress: I painted a bookshelf. A baby can sleep in a dresser drawer, right?

Baby Preparation: Read On Becoming Babywise and watched The Happiest Baby on the Block. Liked both (despite all the controversy) and have unrealistic hopes that I will be able to quiet my screaming baby and sleep 8 hours a night. I'm from South Carolina -- While I breathe, I hope.

Looking forward to this last trimester. And some more Icees.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Summer Means Camp!

2011-06-19T20:14:00.002-04:00

Camp Gravatt

Though this may surprise some of you, I absolutely loved summer camp as a kid!

My first time to overnight camp I was only 4 years old, but loved every minute of it. When my Mom came to picked me up, she saw this feral child with stringy, sun-bleached hair running beside the car. She was about to alert the camp counselors that someone else's child was following her before she realized it was me. And in the same clothes she dropped me off in! I even remember her asking me if there was laundry service at the camp since my entire trunk was neatly washed, folded and packed and looked suspiciously like it did when she packed it 3 days earlier. Let's just say I completely embraced the whole "get dirty at camp" experience.

I grew up going to Camp Gravatt, an Episcopal camp in Aiken, SC. This is not your ritsy, horse-riding and gymnastics type camp. It is more of a giant field with a pond and platform tents. Basically, my kind of place.

I learned to love folk songs, four-square, chigger bites, mess halls, and, most importantly, the life-changing Gravatt Bars (get the recipe here from Bevy, a fellow Gravatt lover).

I continued to go to camp every summer through high school. I spent several summers coming home on Saturday, washing clothes and repacking, and leaving again on Sunday to another camp.

Ironically, you'd have to really bribe me today to get me in the great outdoors. My idea of "roughing it" now is staying in the Bahamas with a window unit instead of central air and no mosquito net.

I can't wait to send my kids to camp one day -- maybe I can come with them?! If I can bring my portable AC unit, that is.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Flashback Friday

2011-06-10T08:00:00.000-04:00

Awww, my little brother, The Fifth was awfully cute. I wonder if he'd still wear footie pajamas? And I wonder how long my parents had wicker furniture inside the house? It should be noted - Big Daddy still has that wicker loveseat, but it has (thankfully) moved to the screened-in porch.

And a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to The Fifth!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Hunger Games Book Review

2011-06-07T19:31:00.003-04:00

Photo Credit

The Hunger Games Trilogy (The Hunger Games, Catching Fire and Mockingjay), Suzanne Collins -

Well, I finally dove into The Hunger Games. The series is not exactly new, but whenever friends recommended it, they really didn't do a very good job promoting it.

"You'll love it! It's post apocalypse and in this country, each district has to send two kids to the games to fight to the death!"

Uh, that sounds disturbing. But I can think of some annoying kids I'd like to send into those games.

"It's technically Young Adult, but so was Twilight."

Comparing books to Twilight is not a good endorsement for me. I did read the whole series, but I think I'm about done with vampire tween love novels.

So I had no real intention of starting the series any time soon. But after reading a few too many Patricia Cornwell and Harlan Coben books in a row, I headed over to the Teen section at the library to check out The Hunger Games.

To my pleasant surprise, they are not nearly as long as the Twilight series, so I knew I wasn't going to spend the next several months wading through thousands of pages of cheesy teen romance.

In fact, the love triangle in The Hunger Games was my favorite part. It put the Bella-Jacob-Edward triangle to shame. I actually found myself rooting for each man-child at different times during the series. I think I finally decided on Team Gale, but Team Peeta got me every time with the bread story. And no one shimmered.

Now, this is no series for the younger tweens. The games were seriously scary and I had more than one nightmare that I was stuck in them myself. (As a side note, these pregnancy dreams are unreal. Actually, they're really real. That's what makes them so unreal. Clear? As mud.)

And Katniss' reluctance to become the face of the rebellion only made her cuter and not a woe-is-me character.

As a series overall, I give it a 4 of 5 drinks.

Now, I'm back into my serial killer novels. You know, to give me a break from the nightmares.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Why Didn't Anyone Tell Me?

2011-05-28T08:00:00.001-04:00

There are a lot of wonderful things about pregnancy. The thick hair, the "glow," the itty bitty socks you can't help but buy.

But there are some things that all these pregnant women have been keeping secret.

Looking Pregnant - Yes, I knew when I got pregnant I would eventually look pregnant. But what I didn't realize is that I would go several months just looking bloated and not really pregnant. I'm now 5 months pregnant and unless it's a pretty tight shirt, I'm still looking "pudgy" and not "preggo."

Acne - I have returned to middle school level acne and there's no medicine I can apply or take for fear my baby will have an arm growing out of their head. Thank goodness Bare Minerals concealer is pregnancy approved.

Weird Pains - What are with these random, stabbing pains? One minute I'm perusing Land of Nod and the next minute I think I've been prison stabbed with a shank and blaming The Fourth. And the cause of these pains? Growing pains from my uterus. Eh, that's just weird.

Bathroom Issues - Let's just leave it at that. But for those who are thinking about getting pregnant soon, go ahead and plan on increasing your fiber.

Crazy Dreams - The Fourth is used to me waking him up begging him to decipher the meanings of my usually bizarre dreams. But since I've been pregnant, the dreams have reached a new level of weirdness. Of course I have lots of dreams about babies (like the one when I gave birth to a little girl who could already talk), but some of these realistic dreams just have me shaking my head for days. And consulting dream interpretations online.

And the biggest surprise of them all...

Pregnancy Is Really 10 Months - When someone finds out you're pregnant, the next question is always, "How far along are you?" I have no idea how to answer this. My doctor and everyone who has been pregnant before states time in weeks. Everyone else calculates the weeks into months. But if you think there are 4 weeks in a month, the end of the pregnancy will be 40 weeks = 10 months. And those last 4 weeks can be brutal. So, now I have to pump myself up for 10 total months of no Rainbow Sushi Rolls, no Rogue Dead Guy Beer and no Italian Subs. Good thing I'm half way there.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Photo Credit: Babycenter.com

Flashback Friday

2011-05-27T08:00:00.000-04:00

Look how cute The Fifth was! With his Le Tigre polo shirt (buttoned alll the way up), his bowl cut, his pre-braces smile! I just hope our child is this cute. And has my math abilities.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Flashback Friday

2011-05-20T08:00:00.000-04:00

Big Daddy, 1972, reading the Comics. This picture was taken with a Polaroid camera and the print is practically made of cardboard. Ah, technology.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Flashback Friday

2011-05-13T08:00:00.000-04:00

Yep, that's me. In all of my 9th grade Civinette semi-formal glory. Bangs and a french twist? Check. Gigantic wrist corsage? Check. Awkward date? Check.

And, it should be noted, my parents had a portrait of their Brittany Spaniel over the mantel. This was only recently replaced by a painting of Dad's hunt club. No fancy schmancy posed family portraits for this family.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

An Escape Saga

2011-05-12T12:34:00.000-04:00

I got a new car! In January.

So why have I been so silent about it until now? Because I've barely seen it myself.

The Fourth surprised me one January Thursday night letting me know he bought me a car on Ebay. And then asked me if I would drive him at the airport at 4:30am the next morning so he could fly to Florida to pick it up. Uhhh, okay. This is what life is like with The Fourth - unexpected, but wonderful surprises at every turn.

Although we were looking for a new car (one specifically with 4 doors for an infant car seat), I was still surprised and pretty excited to see my new ride! Fourteen hours later, The Fourth returned home from Florida driving my new car.

But he had some concerns about some sort of mechanic, drivey, complicated part of the car. And, surprising to both of us, the seller said he'd be glad to fix it. In Florida. So my new car returned to its home state for several weeks.

Then it came home again! And I slapped my license plate from my old car onto my new car and proudly drove it to work for the day. Then The Fourth informed that this is, in fact, illegal. Killjoy. We would have to go to the DMV and do this the official way.

Then The Fourth's air conditioning went out and he politely told me he would be driving the new car while his car got fixed. Then more things went wrong with The Fourth's car and he continued to drive my new car for several more weeks.

And now we're here in May. Four months since we bought the car, and I have yet to drive it across town more than once.

But there is light at the end of this tumultuous tunnel! The Fourth's car is fixed and I'm driving my pretty new Escape!

So cute, right? It's sort of blueish green and has a very sporty rack on top. You know, for all of my outdoor sporting activities, like kayaking, biking...oh, wait, I do none of those things. But let me know if you want me to transport your canoe somewhere; I'd love to put the rack to use!

The back. Still haven't gone to the DMV. Baby steps. And, you can see I already have my Junior League of Columbia sticker on the back! Didn't want to add a towed car from the JLC parking lot to my car drama.

Dixie-Dog is ready to go! This dog loves a car ride.

Make sure to honk and wave when you see me scooting around town!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Baby Swag

2011-05-11T10:28:00.002-04:00

The ultrasound date is set - June 1st! Then we'll know if this little "it" can now be referred to as a "he" or "she!"

That's when the real planning (and buying) can begin. But, for now, I couldn't resist picking up some gender neutral baby swag. And got a couple cute gifts, too!

I'm subscribed to Whattoexpect.com emails and got a promotional email for some free stuff. Obviously, I was all over it.

First up, a baby sling from www.sevenslings.com.

How happy does that baby look strapped to his mama? Of course, I didn't read the directions before I ripped it out of the packaging and I basically just got really tangled in it. I have since taped the directions back together and plan on reading them before the baby comes to have him securely strapped to my chest.

And then I got another email for the awkwardly named Udder Covers.

Why, oh why, did I not come up with this simple, yet genius idea? This is just an apron with a wired top that allows the nursing mama to gaze lovingly to her feeding baby.

When I was engaged, I found that everything that has "wedding" in the description is somehow 4 times more expensive. {Cocktail napkins, $3.50/package. Wedding cocktail napkins, $14/package} I am finding this is also true of baby stuff. How can a tiny outfit the size of a dinner napkin cost so much?

Our friends, Sarah and Ian, gave The Fourth his first baby gift that he actually showed interest in:

Yes, that's right, it's a onesie with the saying "Daddy drinks because I cry!" on it. I'd say they know The Fourth pretty well.

And, my friend, Kiki gave the baby it's first lovie:

Bailey (our dog) has been very interested in the plush, soft toy, but we've managed to keep it out of his reach. But what will we do when the baby comes? How do you keep doggie toys from the baby and baby toys away from the doggie? Or do you just bleach everything and let them share? (I'll let you guess which option I'm leaning towards...)

In related news, I went to a baby shower this weekend and realized I don't know what half of this stuff is. I think I may have a lot of research to do in the next 5 months.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Happy Mother's Day!

2011-05-07T13:14:00.001-04:00

Give your mom a hug this weekend and cherish the time you have together.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

April Book Review

2011-05-05T15:23:00.002-04:00

Me and The Fourth in the Bahamas. Note, there was a book in my hands the entire time.

April meant sitting outside with the sun on my back and a book in my hand. And a week in the Bahamas basically non-stop relaxing and reading, so I thoroughly enjoyed reading some of my favorite authors this month!

The Innocent, Harlan Coben - Oh, how I love Harlan Coben. I think I may just try to read through all his books this year. I even managed to get Kelly hooked on them, too, in the Bahamas. Just wonderful, suspenseful and easy reading. Perfect for the beach! 5 of 5 drinks.

The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald - A classic! I hadn't read this book since high school (AP English with Mr. Raven, maybe?) and after reading The Double Bind in book club (which has many Great Gatsby references), I wanted to reread this book. It was just as good as I remembered and I'm really hoping the rumors are true that Leo DiCaprio will play Jay Gatsby in the movie to be released in 2012. So, go ahead and pick it up and we'll go see them movie together. 5 of 5 drinks.

The Last Precinct, Patricia Cornwell - Well, this series is taking an interesting turn. I think I like it, but I am constantly worried about Marino's health. Is that normal to care that much about book characters? 4 of 5 drinks.

Airframe, Michael Crichton - This book is about a plane crash with some very mysterious causes. Not the best book to read on the way to the Bahamas on a tiny plane. I now know more about wing slats than I ever cared to. And, sadly, this wasn't one of my favorite Michael Crichton books. 2 of 5 drinks.

Promise Me, Harlan Coben - Another HC book! I love how all of his titles are just begging to be whispered in spooky voice. "Promise meee...." 5 of 5 drinks.

Gideon's Sword, Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child - My favorite authors are back! And with a great new character. I'm so excited about this new series and will be first in line with each book. (And, by first in line, I mean at the library. You know I don't pay for books. I got enough bills as it is.) 5 of 5 drinks.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

O$$IV Parasailing Team

2011-05-03T19:18:00.003-04:00

Well, this was an exciting weekend.

A couple years ago, The Fourth bought a parasail on Ebay. Yes, that's right, like a full-size parasail like you see the crazy Jamaicans trying to get you to ride. I can only imagine why there was a parasail for sale on Ebay (I'm thinking that the words "Did Not Meet Expectations" were involved), but The Fourth just couldn't resist.

He has toyed with it several times since he bought it, but never got it "up and going" on Lake Murray. There was the time he got wrapped up in the pine trees. And the time The Fifth (my brother) got swept up in the parachute and dropped in the water (not attached in the harness, incidentally). Subsequently, both The Fifth and I have been banned from even thinking about going up in the parasail.

I had kind of forgotten about it, but somehow the parasail made an appearance again this weekend. And there was no shortage of volunteers for its first successful voyage (which makes me wonder, "What sort of medications do these people take that seems to eliminate all sense of better judgement? Do they know that The Fourth has no clue what he is doing?!")

Saturday had two failed runs. The flyer narrowly avoided a tree only to hit a dock. And most of the time was spent trying to untangle the ropes. It seems that you do not want to be doing this kind of maintenance in the air.

So, The Fourth spent a restless night planning, scheming, and plotting how to get the parasail in the air. I spent the night dreaming of a day when The Fourth would just give all of this up.

Sunday brought new volunteers and a bigger team of assistants. This seemed to be the key. The assistants were needed to hold open the chute to catch the wind. The best take off spot also ended up being a bird sanctuary. I imagine our flyer is crunching purple martin eggs in this photo:

The winds were just right. The sun was setting. My stomach was churning from anxiety.

And then, he just took off!

I think at this point I was screaming like a little girl. And The Fourth was, too.

"It's working! He's actually flying!!"

We cruised all over Lake Murray and the flyer seemed to be living it up 100 feet above us. (He later reported that he could see every building in downtown Columbia. That's a long way away.)

We even had the DNR boat swing by and we could see them checking every manual and booklet on board to find the legality of parasailing. Turns out it is legal. {sigh of relief}

All in all it was an intense event. I was sweaty nervous the whole time, but The Fourth was loving it.

The best quote of the day was from one of the onlookers on a nearby boat,

"This summer is going to be awesome!"

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

When Can We Go Back?

2011-04-28T10:16:00.003-04:00

That little dot is me on the beach:

I just came back from a week in the Paradise that is known as Eleuthera in the Bahamas. I guess you could call it our "Baby Moon," but there were 3 other people there, so I don't know if it still counts. I'm tempted to say it didn't count because I still want to go on another trip in the next 6 months. Are you listening, The Fourth?

So what did we do on this wonderful week?

1. Eat. Conch fritters, Spanish Mackerel and Shark (caught by The Fourth!), prime rib. I may or may not have gained a pound a day. Don't judge.

2. Drink. The Fourth enjoyed the Bahemian beer Kalik while I sipped Virgin Daiquiris and Margaritas. They were good, but let's be honest. It just ain't the same.

3. Be Merry. Which, for me, meant reading. Lots and lots of reading. I've got a nice big stack of books to review for April and, strangely, that makes me very proud.

This is me in the inner tube reading at the pool:

The Fourth was sweet and tried to hang with the girls one day by the pool while we chatted, read and rotated chairs in and out of the sun. He made it about 20 minutes before going stir-crazy. He then spent the next 6 days fishing. But deep-sea fishing in the Bahamas is different than fishing in South Carolina. He could go whatever time he wanted (instead of leaving at 4:30am), he had a captain on this boat (who I imagine did most of the work), and, most importantly, he caught fish (pretty rare for The Fourth's trips off the SC coast)!

All in all, we were both happy. And still spent lots of quality time together in the evenings and had a blast playing Apples to Apples with our friends. Does Apples to Apples ever get old? I doubt it.

But now we're back in the real world and I can only daydream about the sun, sand and stacks of books. Sigh.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

March Book Review

2011-04-13T09:47:00.000-04:00

I am so embarrassed. I read just 1 book in March -- Parrot & Olivier in America by Peter Carey.

While I'm tempted to blame my slow reading on too much work, extreme fatigue from pregnancy or any other lame excuse, the real reason is: I just couldn't get into this book.

And what's sad? It was good.

Olivier is a whiny, spoiled noble who is sent to America (when all his relatives are being sent to the guillotine) to study the American prison system. Parrot has lived a wild and rough life and ends up being sent to tag along with Olivier (who he refers to as "Lord Migraine") to look after and report back to Olivier's mother.

It's a great story of historical fiction and is so well-written. But I just couldn't sit down and read it for very long. My eyelids would get heavy, my mind would wander and suddenly I would find myself dozing off.

So my final review? 3 of 5 drinks.

And my favorite quote from the book from the bratty Olivier and his thoughts on America:

"I have it from Duponceau that the restless Benjamin Franklin - who supposedly taught himself 5 languages, invented bifocal glasses and the lightning rod - is responsible for the awful rocking chair. I had that particular horror removed from the deluxe cabin and replaced with a comfortable wing-backed reading chair which would not rock no matter how heavily I sat in it."

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Pregnancy Q & A

2011-04-11T21:22:00.004-04:00

Well, I have really good intentions of doing my monthly book review soon, but after yesterday's post, I thought I better answer a few popular questions.

When are you due? October 19th. But I'm hoping for October 16th. We got married August 16th, my birthday is September 16th, a baby on October 16th would just make sense! And (almost) guarantee that The Fourth remembers Baby's Birthday. Or at least know he needs to buy presents every month.

How do you feel? Surprisingly good. Somehow I totally missed the 1st Trimester puking. There were a couple nights I had some nausea when I went to bed, but it was nothing a couple chocolate chip cookies couldn't solve.

Are you having any food cravings? Oh yes. I already mentioned Bartlett Pears and Chick-fil-A Polynesian Sauce. But also:

*Sonic Jr. Candy Sundae (Ya'll. If you have not gotten one of these bad boys yet, you are missing out! A cup of soft serve ice cream, your choice of candy topping - M&M's, Heath, Oreo, Butterfinger, or Reese's - whipped cream and a cherry on top! All of $1!!! I may or may not have had more than 1 on some days. They're tiny, okay. But oh-so-delicious.)

* Zen Mix (I don't know who told me about the Zen Mix from Target, but I owe them big time. Rice crackers, crunchy unknown things that taste like soy sauce, and the very important wasabi peas. Exactly what I need for my mid-morning snack!)

* Yogurt Covered Raisins.

* Cotton Candy. (I definitely sweet talked The Fourth into going to Cromer's for me. I snarfed down some better-than-the-fair cotton candy this weekend and have plans to go back soon.)

Do your clothes fit? Not really. And if Gap doesn't hurry up and send my pants this week, I'm going to be going to work pantsless.

What does The Fourth think about all of this? He's overwhelmed, happy, excited, in shock, confused, helpful beyond belief. You know, typical new Dad stuff.

Any other big questions I forgot?

Eating and Drinking (for two),

Mary Douglass

Searching WebMD For These Symptoms

2011-04-10T10:23:00.000-04:00

Something is wrong with me. I've got a strange range of symptoms. Let me know what you think could be wrong with me: *Exhaustion. Like, for real tired. I wake up and immediately start thinking about when I can take a nap. * Hunger. The best way to describe this hunger is the "Chinese Food Phenomenon." (You stuff your face with Chinese food and somehow 2 hours later you are starving again. That pretty accurately describes my hunger.) * Weight Gain. Specifically in my belly. Pictured below.

* Acne. I thought that I was in my late 20's, but the way my face is acting up, I look more like a 14 year old. And not in a "fresh-faced youth" way; more of "candidate for Accutane" way.

* 2 Heartbeats. Yep, i went to the doctor and what do you know? They heard 2 heartbeats on the Doppler! One is a hearty (heh, get it?) 80 beats/minute; the other a pounding 165 beats/minute.

* Strange Food Cravings. I liked Chick-fil-A Polynesian sauce back in high school, but when they came out with the Buffalo sauce, I pretty much stuck to that for my chicken nuggets. But lately? I've been snarfing down at least 2 packages of the Polynesian sauce just for a 6-pack and small fry! Even the thought of it right now makes my mouth water for that sugary goodness. Also? Pears taste better than they've ever tasted. I may or may not have eaten more than a dozen Bartlett Pears in the past week.

* Even Stranger Web Tendencies. I've been browsing websites like Zulily, Project Nursery and Gap (well, Gap's not that strange. But this particular part of Gap.com is.)

Weird stuff, right?!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

PS: Yes, I'm serious. There is a little MD or The Fourth on the way!

Sleep Late? Don't Mind If I Do..

2011-03-25T09:50:00.003-04:00

Read this article and watch this video to see why Ben Stein is my new hero:

Sleep In

"Never waste any time you could be sleeping."

Ah, Ben Stein, you are a genius. I love to sleep and I'm glad to see that I'm justified in my "Early to Bed, Late to Rise" mentality.

What I always consider a character flaw (laziness, perhaps?) is now applauded. Why waste time on Facebook when I could be sleeping?! Why do another load of laundry when I could be snoozing?!

I love to crawl into bed, pull the covers up*, and go to sleep. And I like to sleep late. My absolute favorite is to get up in the morning, eat breakfast, brush my teeth, and go back to bed. You wouldn't believe the fabulous mid-morning sleep you get on a full tummy.

Unfortunately work tends to get in the way of this luxury. (Don't you love the part of the video when he says kids have to go to school insanely early, like 7am?! Yes, Mr. Stein, that is insanely early.)

I'm also thrilled to hear him say that "enough sleep" is really 10 hours and not a pathetic 8 hours or a suicidal 6 hours. 10 hours?! Yes, please! That means going to bed at 11pm and not getting up until 9am. That, people, is some good sleep!

And it's true. I get very grumpy with any lack of sleep and The Fourth has to endure my wrath until I get caught up on some zzz's.

So, fellow long-sleepers, get rid of your guilt and enjoy your smart use of time! I know I will; I'm tired just thinking about it.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

*Yes, covers all year round, even when it's blazing hot. The Fourth finds this weird. But he can't hang a hand, foot or any body part off the side of the bed (fear of Freddy Krueger, perhaps?), and I think that's weird.

What Not To Wear

2011-03-20T18:28:00.000-04:00

I have a weekend chock-full of wedding festivities coming up the first weekend in April.

Rehearsal dinner, bridesmaid's luncheon, and wedding will all require cute, season-appropiate dresses. All of which I can't seem to find in my closet. I imagine The Fourth is rolling his eyes at that statement.

{It should be noted that I hate, HATE "Rushing the Season." You know what I'm talking about. When girls suddenly start sporting flip flops, sundresses, and - gasp! - white at the first sign of warm temperatures and long before Easter. The only exception to the rule is The Carolina Cup, which often falls before Easter. I'm totally okay with sundresses at this event, 'cause that's the whole reason for going.}

The first weekend in April is a full 3 weeks before Easter. So all bright colored sundresses are out. (And obviously all mostly white dresses, too. The only person who should be wearing white to a wedding is the bride. But just to be on the safe side, I don't wear white at showers, rehearsal dinners, and luncheons either. Sadly, my day in the bridal spotlight has come and gone.)

But if this weekend's weather is any indication, it could be very warm in April. So I'd just look ridiculous in some of my fall favorites, which are mostly brown, gray and black. (I used to always wear black to a wedding, but lately I feel like I want to be more festive and wear colors.)

And, the saddest part, I don't have a lot of dough to drop on these elusive "Spring transition" dresses to just go out and grab one I like.

So, what's a girl to do? Jewel tones? Metallics? Maybe even navy with a really great necklace?

Oh, what first world problems I have.

I'll let you know how this all works out.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Adventures with Oil Soap

2011-03-11T11:48:00.003-05:00

The Fourth has a lot of T-shirts. He also has hyperhidrosis (it's a medical condition).

So it's only a matter of time before his shiny new white T-shirts start getting dingy.

In a surprising domestic move, I decided to attack these yellowed shirts to their original white glory.

I Googled a series of terms: "wash T-shirts," "dingy," "nothing else works."

I came across a website that swore that the key to cleaning white T-shirts was Murphy's Oil Soap. "Hmm, I'm desperate enough to try that," I thought to myself. And I decided to try it out.

The directions were simple enough: Rub Murphy's Oil Soap on stains. Let sit for half hour. Play on Facebook while waiting. Wash clothes in hot water. Squeal with glee that shirts are brand-new shiny white. (Well, that was it, more or less.)

I followed all the directions just like it said, but the stains remained. They didn't even get a little bit lighter!

And The Fourth complained for a week that he smelled like a janitor.

The only good news is that I finally cleaned my floors with the leftover soap. So I'm still a little bit domestic.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

A Quiet Day

2011-03-10T15:22:00.003-05:00

There hasn't been much going on around the Smith household in recent weeks. This is that weird time of year when we stay bustled up indoors and don't have long, lazy days at the lake or beach.

And, with all of this quiet time, my mind has been prone to wander. And, if you know me in real life or just on this blog, you know that I can have wild trains of thought.

Here are some of the things I've been thinking about:

1) Why do green olives come in a resealable jar and black olives come in a can? I have been eating olives like crazy lately (since The Fourth bought 2 mega-jars at Sam's), and I have love for both green and black olives. But once you open the jar of black olives, you're pretty much obligated to eat all of them since you can't close the lid. Is this a health issue -- like, do black olives go bad if put in a jar with a lid that actually closes? And, more importantly, will I get sick from putting my black olives in leftover green olive jars? 'Cause that's definitely what I've been doing.

2) I have added an obscene amount of interior decorating blogs to my Google Reader recently. I've never been a decorator and my style can only be described as "Partly Finished." I get on Do-It-Yourself kicks, but usually teeter out and leave trails of hot glue, fabric scraps and unframed pictures in my wake. So why the sudden interest in decorating blogs? My guess is that I enjoy reading them more than cleaning my own half-completed home.

3) I'm snacking on these candies right now.

I spotted the box when I went shopping at the dollar store for some tissue paper and quickly added it to my cart. When was the last time you had Sweetarts? I couldn't even remember, but I'm thinking it may have been at the skating rink in Irmo and I had bangs at the time (circa 1995). The good news is that they are just as delicious as I remember.

4) With all the basketball on TV and lack of cable, The Fourth and I have been watching a lot of NetFlix. We've made it to Season 4 on "Friday Night Lights" (love Tim Riggins more and more, but not sure about these new characters) after a long break from it. And we watched "The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia." Everyone has been talking about it and we decided to see what all the hubba-ba-loo was about. It. Was. Awesome. The entire time you watch this crazy West Virginia family's antics, you can't believe it is real. And, yet, you know it is ('cause it's labeled as "Documentary" in NetFlix.) What is it that makes it so fascinating? Is it the family-wide drug use during the matriarch's 84th birthday? Or the cousin with the gas-huffing problem and can't remember which side of his brain ("Left? Right? Left, maybe? I can't remember.") is being destroyed by the addiction? Or is it just the names -- Poney, Jesco, Sue Bob, Mousie, Kirk (a female), Little Man and Wimpy, to name a few. Whatever it is, it's the ultimate train wreck to watch.

5) I'm reading a book right now but am not really into it. Am I bored of reading? Am I bored with the book? Am I just too tired lately? Am I reading too many blogs? I think the answer to all of these may be YES.

Oh, the things that go through my mind... It's a scary place.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

February Book Review

2011-03-04T09:50:00.000-05:00

The end of another month means another monthly book review!

The Dinosaur Hunter, Homer Hickam -- I got this first book choice from the RCPL's list of "Books Everyone Will Be Talking About," or something to that effect. (I have searched high and low on myrcpl.com and can not seem to find the list anymore. Figures.) I liked it. But didn't love it. I was looking forward to reliving my archeology days (Did I mention I went to Archeology Camp as a kid? I then spent the entire month afterwards digging up bottle tops and rusty nails in the back yard. Turns out, there are no dinosaurs in Whitehall.) But I had a hard time relating to the characters in the book and never really embraced them. It was a well-written story, though, so that bumps up its rating. Rating: 4 of 5 drinks.

Jane Eyre, Charlotte Bronte -- While I gave myself a hearty pat on the back for finally reading some real literature, I struggled through this one. Whhhyyy is it so long? Whhhyy is it so depressing?? Whhhyyy did Jane whine so much?? (You'd think I could relate to that...) This was our book club choice this month as we get ready for the upcoming movie release. Let's just hope the movie isn't quite as depressing as the book. Rating: 3 of 5 Drinks

Point of Origin, Patricia Cornwell -- After 700 pages of orphanages, lunatic wives and cousins proposing to each other (see above), I decided to go back to my faithful murder mystery. This one was one of the better books in the Scarpetta series and I enjoyed reading this one by the pool. Well, to be honest, I could read a medical brochure by the pool and be happy. Rating: 4 of 5 Drinks

Gone For Good, Harlan Coben -- I've read a bunch of Harlan Coben's books and this one did not disappoint! Every time I thought I had figured out the mystery, there was a surprising twist. And then another one. And then another one. I was literally at the last page before I had it all figured out. It was great! Rating: 5 of 5 drinks

Dewey: The Small-Town Library Cat Who Touched the World, Vicki Myron -- I do not like cats. They make me itch. And they have bad attitudes. But, after reading this sweet true story about a library cat, I almost love Dewey! Dewey (named after the famed, although unused, decimal library system) was dropped off in the book drop at the Spencer Library in Iowa on the coldest night of the year. So, naturally, the kind-hearted librarians adopted him as their own and he lived the next 18 years in the library. Read it only if you want to have your heart warmed. Rating: 5 of 5 drinks

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Photo Credits - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Vacation Bliss

2011-03-01T18:08:00.002-05:00

Wondering where I've been? Missed me terribly?

Don't worry about me; I've been fine. In fact, I've been better than fine. I've been vacationing!

I had a couple days of vacation to take ("Use 'em or lose 'em," as my employer says), so The Fourth and I headed down to the sunny state of Florida for some serious relaxation.

The Fourth and I have perfected the art of relaxing. We are not the action-adventure-vacation family you see driving down the interstate with bikes, tents and sleeping bags in the back of the station wagon.

The most we moved during our 6 days in New Smyrna Beach was the short walk to the pool and a brief ride on beach cruiser bikes.

We sat in bathing suits and enjoyed over 80 degree temps.

We got sunburned -- The Fourth missed a patch on his side; you can even see the finger marks of where he did manage to put sunscreen. I got burned on my "sweet meat." That little part of your body above your arm pit, but below your shoulder. I'd take a picture, but I doubt you want to see my sweet meat.

I read a lot. The Fourth sent pictures of our view of the pool to the schmucks stuck at work.

We swam in the heated pool - heavenly. - and the hot tub - even more heavenly during the brief moments when the sun hid behind the clouds.

We cooked some. And went out to eat some. And watched a lot of movies and Friday Night Lights on NetFlix.

We even saw the Shuttle Launch from the beach.

I was hoping to make the 15 mile drive to Port Canaveral to see the launch in person. But it turns out you have to camp out the night before. And there are a million other people. And you're not even all that close (I guess I was imagining myself on the tarmac just yards away from the blast-off?) But we had a great view from the beach and I was still able to channel my inner astronaut and my soothe my failed dreams of going to Space Camp.

Monday I returned to work (begrudgingly) and am slowly getting back into the swing of things. Just shake me if you see me day-dreaming about sand, surf, and warm sun on my sweet meat.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Calling Betty Ford

2011-02-16T12:09:00.003-05:00

I am thinking about joining AA. Aviators Anonymous.

First Step is acceptance.

Second Step is cutting off all sunglass purchases.

Third Step is posting it on your blog.

Fourth Step...oh, that's as far as I've gone.

I'll let you know how the rest works out.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Happy Valentine's Day!

2011-02-14T18:53:00.002-05:00

Things that made me happy on this Valentine's Day:

1) Gorgeous Weather. Spring, hello? Is that you??

2) Walking in the neighborhood with The Fourth on this pretty day. I even wore shorts! And, uh, sorry to that driver I blinded with my oh-so-white legs.

3) Right this very second, The Fourth is making me dinner and I don't have to help (I'll be especially grateful if I don't have to clean, too...)

4) "Slapsgiving" rerun of HIMYM on TV.

5) Also on TV tonight -- IBM's Watson is challenging Ken Watson and some other dude on Jeopardy tonight! I am so strangely excited about this!

6) The Fourth did not buy me a carnation, rose, balloon, card, or plush animal from a roadside stand today.

7) Easter candy is now stocked at my drug store. Time for malted milk ball eggs, jelly beans, and all things Russell Stover.

8) This picture from Cakewrecks.com:

(Look at the purple heart, bottom left)

I hope your Valentine's Day was at least half as good!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Good Ol' Raisins & Peanuts

2011-02-05T07:30:00.000-05:00

I'm on a serious trail mix kick right now.

I'm not even sure how it started, but I find myself snacking on the fruit and nut blends at work (It should be noted, though - I add in extra M&M's), making trips to The Fresh Market to check out their fancy mixes, and even mixing up my own with leftover party nuts, raisins and, of course, more M&M's.

I love the Asian mixes found at World Market with the puffy rice pieces and Wasabi peas. And I don't have to worry about The Fourth eating all of it because he doesn't eat spicy (read: He's a wimp).

I like to add different types of M&M's to my mix (not the Asian one, obviously, that would be gross with all the Wasabi peas). And since I discovered Pretzel M&M's, I am having some logic issues:

You can not add too many M&M's to Trail Mix.

You can add too many pretzels to Trail Mix

You can not add too many Pretzel M&M's to Trail Mix. Go figure.

More great add-ins:

Pistachios (already shelled; I tried the shelled ones and it really slowed down my shoving handfuls of the mix into my mouth)

Sunflower seeds (saw chocolate covered sunflower seeds at The Gourmet Shop today. You thinking what I'm thinking?)

Craisins (or as I call them, "The Yummy Raisins")

Crispix

Tiny Marshmallows

Banana Chips, dried apricots, and, when I'm feeling rich, dried canteloupe or kiwi from TFM. Yummmm.

Excuse me, I'm going to have to go make some Trail Mix. Like NOW.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

This Land is My Land

2011-02-04T17:05:00.004-05:00

Egypt is going through some tough times. This was on my mind while I was working this weekend and looking out the drive-thru window.

I saw:

1) A Confederate Flag flying above Maurices Barbeque

2) An anti-abortion advocate with a baby doll attached to his chest.

and 3) A man selling couches for $299 out of his truck.

I love America.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Photo sources here and here

The Big Game

2011-01-28T11:05:00.000-05:00

Sunday, February 6th will be a big day for game fans! There will be intense competition, acts of sportsmanship and, most importantly, Chihuhua Cheerleaders.

I actually care nothing about the Super Bowl. From what I can tell, this year will be some combination of Roman Numerals (XLI? VXL? XIILM? Who knows.) and two teams from snowy places will be playing.

But there is a game I will be watching starting at 3 PM EST. And that is Puppy Bowl VII!

Don't know about the Puppy Bowl? That's because you've been wasting your time watching the Super Bowl. Change the channel this year to Animal Planet and get ready to melt with the wonderful goodness that is puppies.

The basic concept is that a group of puppies of different breeds are put into a fenced-in area (with yard lines, no less) and are allowed to run amok. There are terrier tackles, puppy penalties, and Fido first downs -- there is actually a ref who blows a whistle. He calls a "flag on the play" when there's a potty mishap. But my personal favorite is the Water Bowl Cam.

There's also the Kitty half-time show featuring the felines that make my nose run and my eyes itch.

So, take a break from the Eagles and the Ravens (or Elephants and Kangaroos, whoever is playing) and check out the Puppy Bowl. You'll love it.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

All pictures are from Animal Planet -- where you can get all the deets on Puppy Bowl VII!

January Book Review

2011-01-27T08:00:00.000-05:00

I thought I would try to do my book reviews monthly, instead of yearly - which seemed to overwhelm all of us, yes?

I know January is not quite over, but I'm right in the middle of a book and probably won't finish it before the end of the month. So I'll just wait to review that one next month. I made up the game so I get to make up the rules.

First book of 2011 was Unnatural Exposure by Patricia Cornwell. My love for a forensic murder mystery is well documented and this one did not disappoint. I did have resulting nightmares of autopsy saw murderers and mutant smallpox infections, but I think that is just to be expected from that type of book. I have heard that the Kay Scarpetta series starts to become more focused on her niece Lucy and I started to see this in the 8th book of the series. Frankly, Lucy annoys me and I hope she gets her act together if she's going to start being a bigger character. Overall rating: 4 of 5 drinks.

Next up was Pirate Latitudes by Michael Crichton. I was shocked and disappointed to see that Michael Crichton had died in 2008 and I didn't even know about it until 2010. Fortunately for the world, this manuscript was found on his computer and published posthumously in 2009.

(A couple thoughts about this -- If I went to the big blog in the sky today, you would find no top-selling manuscript left on my computer, that's for sure. Just a bunch of half finished blog posts and angry emails never sent. And that is very very lame. Also, did anyone notice I used the word "posthumously?" How awesome is that? But I had to Google it for the right spelling, which sort of takes the awesomeness away.)

Steven Spielberg has agreed to adapt the book to film, which will probably blow Pirates of the Caribbean out of the...well, Caribbean Sea. Word also has it that another novel was found on Crichton's computer and will be published in 2012. If only I could be that lucky to be making money even while not working. Overall rating: 5 of 5 drinks.

After two fiction books, I changed it up with some non-fiction. The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks by Rebecca Skloot was a great book and I was surprised how much I liked it! You may remember from your Biology 101 class hearing about some HeLa cells that are used in just about every medical study. They've been to space, been nuked by atomic bombs, tested drugs for every disease and were important in the polio and Hepatitis vaccines. And they came from a woman named Henrietta Lacks who had cervical cancer and never even knew the doctor took her cells. Dun dun dunnnnnn. Hooked already? Check it out; you'll love it. Overall rating: 5 of 5 drinks.

And, finally, our book club's choice this month was Mennonite in a Little Black Dress: A Memoir of Going Home by Rhoda Janzen. The book club was split 3 ways in their opinion of the book - those who loved it (well, only me), those who hated it and those who didn't even read it (I'm just glad Lara wasn't there, she would not be impressed). I found the book absolutely hilarious, but other people were annoyed by the "big words." I mostly just read over these words and didn't waste time looking them up. Cause I'm a literary rebel. Overall Rating: 4 of 5 drinks.

Reading any good books that just have to be on my list for February? Share the wealth!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

I Think Winter Makes Me Grumpy

2011-01-26T07:00:00.000-05:00

Another picture I came across while cleaning our hard drive:

That would be me deep-sea fishing. The Fourth absolutely loves to fish, but I do not. I know I'm smiling in that picture, but I actually was not very happy. It turns out that there is a lot of work in fishing (I have zero upper body strength) and I'd much prefer sitting on the beach with a good book.

Especially when a shark bites my catch while I'm reeling it in (see above picture. That's a delicious tuna that has been shredded by a shark. Sigh.)

These pictures made me think of several things that I don't like but wish that I did:

1. Oatmeal - I've tried several times to eat oatmeal with no success. With and without sugar, brown sugar, cinnamon and fruit. I know it's healthy and make me skinny, blah blah blah. All of it just takes like a bad version of grits. I do still love grits. With cheese and butter, please!

2. The Bachelor - I had not seen The Bachelor since about 2003 and happened to tune in this week to see how it's stayed on for the better part of a decade. Oh. My. Are these girls for real? Are they really that crazy and is The Bachelor really that naive to their scheming? And I'll just go ahead and say it - of course it's the best date you've ever been on. You're in a helicopter with champagne and you're going to an amazing dinner, all on someone else's tab. I think I just lost brain cells I'll never get back.

3. The Mountains - We are in the time of year where everyone talks about going to the mountains, skiing, and other snowy related activities. No, thank you. If I do end up going, don't expect to see me on the slopes. I'll stay at the chalet and keep snow on the keg and the hot tub warm. Fortunately, The Fourth feels the same way and so we're saving up for a trip to the Bahamas. Where he will be fishing and I'll be sitting on the beach.

4. Miller Lite - For a long time I thought all beer was basically the same. Oh, how mistaken I was. Bottom line: Miller Lite is grody and makes my stomach hurt. Rogue Dead Guy is delicious and makes my wallet hurt.

5. Pointy Heels - Ah, the days of my youth when I could strut around in high heels. Okay, there was no strutting. But I've gotten to the point where I can't even stumble on high heels. My closet is now filled with flats, wedges and kitten heels. And my feet are happy.

6. Chick Lit - Is it creepy that I'd rather read a murder mystery than chick lit? Does it reveal some sadistic character flaw? Either way, I will not be reading the latest Shopaholic book or Emily Giffin book. Jen Lancaster, though, falls under the category of "Pee-my-pants-funny" and I will still read those.

Can you tell that winter is just wearing on me and making me grumpy? I'll work on a post soon of things that make me happy; promise!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Come Back Spring!

2011-01-25T15:31:00.007-05:00

I recently came across this picture while saving pictures onto my fancy new flash drive:

This picture was taken this summer and I instantly became depressed.

Winter is really taking a toll on this ol' gal and I'm none too happy about it.

My tan is completely faded (I never truly "tan," but compared to my current state, I look almost copper in that picture!). I would currently describe my skin tones with adjectives like: translucent, snowy, and instution-wall white. Even my freckles are gone - just looking at my shoulders in the picture makes me smile. There's just something I love about my freckles. I like to think they are more "sun-kissed" than "Pippi Longstocking." But there is hardly a freckle on my sun deprived skin now.

And what's with the dry skin? My normal more-on-the-oily side skin is itchy, scaly, and resistant to lotion. And you know where it's the most itchy? Directly in between my shoulder blades! Who is that flexible to scratch that illusive itch? And, so, I am finding myself scratching my back against door frames Baloo-the-bear style.

My hair is darker and more dishwater colored. I keep entertaining the idea of coloring it, but know I'll just enter the never-ending cycle of roots I don't maintain. Like I need another thing on the to-do list. Plus, I'd rather spend the money on a massage. And I'll throw in an extra tip if she scratches between my shoulder blades.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

PS: It should be noted - The low humidity during winter really is better for my hair. Rather than having a constant halo of fuzzy hair, I have much smoother and shinier hair. You win this round, Winter.

Picture Source

2010 Book Review

2011-01-13T10:11:00.003-05:00

I just finished my first book of 2011 and realized I didn't even document and review my books from 2010. I do keep some book reviews on the right hand column of the blog, but it's definitely not a comprehensive list.

I will do my best to list and (quickly) review my list from 2010. It should be noted, though, that I have a couple disclaimers.

I love forensic-type murder mysteries (Kathy Reichs and Patricia Cornwell, mostly), but since I've read so many of them and they're all alike, I can't really keep them all straight; so only 1 review for all of them: People die. Smart lady figures it out.

Some books I didn't even finish; life is too short for bad books.

I pick books based on: our book club choices, friend recommendations, New York Times Bestsellers List, and authors I have liked in the past. I would like to read more classic literature in 2011, but don't expect to see much from 2010. Unless you count the Harry Potter series. Which I do.

And here we go!

1) The Glass Castle, Jeannette Walls - Think your family is crazy? Read this.
2) Too Close to the Falls, Catherine Gildiner - Another memoir. I got a little over memoirs about crazy people after this one.
3) Bones to Ashes, Kathy Reichs
4) Handle with Care, Jodi Picolt - I've read this book before; it was called "My Sister's Keeper."
5) Sins of the Fathers, James Scott Bell - Good, easy read. Would read more by this author.
6) The Lovely Bones, Alice Sebold - One Word: Overrated.
7) You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start In The Morning, Celia Rivenbark - I want Celia to be my bestest friend.
8) The Alexandria Link, Steve Berry - Love Steve Berry books; they hold me over until Dan Brown writes another book.
9) The Blind Side, Michael Lewis - Too much football blah blah blah. I skipped over almost entire chapters.
10) The Lost Symbol, Dan Brown - I now know all the Masonic secrets. Bahahahaha! Big Daddy and The Fifth (who are Masons) say it's not true. But I think they're a part of the conspiracy.

11) Impact, Douglas Preston - Love all books by this author. A meteor goes straight through the earth, what's not to like?
12) Girls in Trucks, Katie Crouch - Bad. Just bad. Such a Southern disappointment.
13) The Girl That Played with Fire, Steig Lasson - My favorite one of the trilogy.
14) Devil Bones, Kathy Reichs
15) Moon Women, Pamela Duncan - Read this one because it was part of the Southern Writer Series at RCPL. Maybe would have liked more if I had sisters.
16) Secrets of Eden, Chris Bohjalian - Liked this one! Pretty surprising end.
17) Coming Home: Life, Love & All Things Southern, Robert Inman - Another writer from Southern Writer Series. Really enjoyed it and heard him speak at the library. Such a nice guy!
18) Winter Garden, Kristin Hannah - This book totally gave me Russian nightmares, but I liked it still the same.
19) Swan Thieves, Elizabeth Kostava - Great book; learned a lot about art and how to steal it!
20) Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet, Jamie Ford: Such a sweet and poignant book. And, by the way, we were jerks to the Asians.

21) The Templar Legacy, Steve Berry - Nonstop suspense.
22) 206 Bones, Kathy Reichs
23) Perfect Match, Jodi Picoult - Typical JP book.
24) So Long, Insecurity, Beth Moore - I actually read a self-help book. And it actually helped!
25) The Fortune Cookie Chronicles, Jennifer 8. Lee - One of the best books I read in 2010! And, yes, her middle name is "8."
26) Sarah's Key, Tatiana DeRosnay - More nightmares after this book. I still liked it, though.
27) Second Glance, Jodi Picoult - Another JP typical book. I started getting a little tired of them at this point.
28) Postmortem, Patricia Cornwell
29) The Reliable Wife, Robert Goolrick - That wife was not reliable. And the book was not good.
30) The Romanov Prophecy, Steve Berry - Those crazy Catholics.

31) The Little Giant of Aberdeen County, Tiffany Baker - A lot of hype about this book; it was alright.
32) Body of Evidence, Patricia Cornwell
33) The Walk, Richard Paul Evans - Patiently waiting on this sequel. Easy and sweet read.
34) All That Remains, Patricia Cornwell
35) Caught, Harlen Coben - This author is great! Enjoyable mysteries with lots of humor.
36) Spooky Little Girl, Laurie Notaro - I usually like her non-fiction books, but this was okay for her first step into fiction.
37) Firefly Lane, Kristin Hannah - Put this one down halfway through. Didn't like it; too much whining.
38) Little Bee, Chris Cleave - Only read this if you want to enter a deep, dark depression. Didn't finish this one either.
39) Long Lost, Harlen Coben - This is when I started reading a whole bunch from this author.
40) Fade Away, Harlen Coben - Good, too.

41) Mercy, Jodi Picoult - Got a little sick of JP at this point. Didn't finish this one and went back to Harlen Coben books.
42) Just One Look, Harlen Coben
43) Tell No One, Harlen Coben
44) The Double Bind, Chris Bohjalian - Now I want to read The Great Gatsby.
45) Midwives, Chris Bohjalian - Have your kid in a hospital. Read this story if you don't believe me.
46) Cruel and Unusual - Patricia Cornwell
47) Washington Schlepped Here, Christopher Buckley - Read it if you're traveling to DC!
48) Heart of the Matter, Emily Giffin - I'm just not really into Emily Giffin's books.
49) That Lace Reader, Brunonia Barry - Liked it more after talking about it in book club.
50) The Art of Racing in the Rain, Garth Stein - Sweet book, read it if you have conversations with your dog.

51) The Gift, Richard Paul Evans - Cheesy, but sweet. Read it for Christmas.
52) The Terminal Man, Michael Crichton - I realize how late I am to the MC books. But they're so good!
53) The Andromeda Strain, Michael Crichton - It is amazing to me that this book was written in 1969 - the science in it is scary how modern it is!
54) The Body Farm, Patricia Cornwell
55) Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone, JK Rowling - This is when I read the whole HP series to get ready for the movie. They were just as good (even better!) than I remember!
56) Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, JK Rowling
57) Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban, JK Rowling
58) Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
59) Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix, JK Rowling
60) Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince, JK Rowling

61) Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows, JK Rowling - Sigh, I miss Dumbledore.
62) The Alchemist, Paulo Coehlo - Such an insightful book; something I should read every year.
63) The Fifth Mountain, Paulo Coehlo- Pretty good book; I just couldn't get into it. Didn't finish it.
64) The Ape House, Sara Gruen - Great book! Very different from Water From Elephants; glad to see the author have such a broad way of writing.
65) Eye of the Needle, Ken Follett - Everyone kept recommending this author to me. Started with this first book; pretty good, got kind of confused in the war details, though.

Can't wait to see what books 2011 brings!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Spring Weddings

2011-01-10T17:04:00.000-05:00

I am super excited about some Spring weddings.

First and foremost, there is my former dream boyfriend's wedding: Prince William's. Fortunately, I think Kate is a cutie and so I approve of his choice (if it can't be me).

So, P-Dub (not to take away from Pioneer Woman's nickname, but it does sorta fit, yes?) will have his nuptials April 29th and I plan on celebrating like I'm there. I realize that it may be at 5am (like Princess Di's; when I was but a babe), but I will be serving champagne and petit fours. And dressing up fancy. And everyone is invited. Mark it on your calendar.

Fortunately, I can get my wedding fever satisfied even before P-Dub's wedding -- my dear friend Emily is getting married at the beginning of April. Why is this so exciting? A) She's cute B) The wedding will be a.mazing. C) I'm reading the Old Testament. Which is important, yo. D) Did I mention how cute she is??

Since my own wedding, I've become even more enamoured with weddings. I love the parties. I love the dinners. I love the planning. I especially love the parties (did I already mention that?). Point is, I reached a point in my life where I realized what a special time this is in someone's life and I want to be a part of every. single. second of it. And, poor Emily, has endured my constant pleading to showers, parties and dress fittings. I swear I'll tell her she looks pretty in everything and bring appropriate gifts. I just want to see every minute of this happy time and spend the next 4 months telling Emily how great she is and how lucky her fiance is. And that's what a wedding is all about.

My manners have also improved significantly since I got married. I am much better about regrets and RSVPs, I always thank the hostess of the parties and showers, and I write thank you notes to the parents of the bride after a wedding (well, most of the time, sometimes I still slack off). There's just something about getting married yourself that makes you realize how important these manners are and how much you appreciate the people who follow them.

As my Mom would say, "You never realize who your true friends are until you have a wedding!" So true, Mom.

So I'm raising a glass of champagne to all the spring weddings and checking my mailbox daily for my invitation!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

2011 Resolutions

2011-01-07T10:35:00.000-05:00

Sure, New Year's resolutions are dumb. And no one actually keeps them. And if you don't include "Lose Weight" on your list, the rest of us think you are a skinny snob.

So, without further ado, here's Eat, Drink & Be Mary Douglass' 2011 Resolutions!

1) Stop interrupting - This is on my list every year. I like to pretend that I am just so excited about talking to you, that I get carried away with my part of the conversation and put my two cents in before you've put a single penny in. But, really, I'm just being a jerk and think what I have to say is just way more important than what you have to say. I resolve to stop opening my big fat mouth while you are trying to tell me something. No matter how boring it may be.

2) Remember names when I meet someone - When I meet someone new, my mind starts racing with ridiculous thoughts and I totally miss his or her name and subsequently get in awkward situations where I try to say hello without knowing his or her name. What sort of ridiculous thoughts do I have?

Possible new friend: "Nice to meet you Mary Douglass! I'm..."

Mary Douglass' thoughts: Wow, her hair is so cute. I wonder if I could get away with bangs like that. I doubt it. I had bangs until I was 16 and I'm not really sure I could go back. But she seems to have a square face. I think I have more of a round moon-like face. Ooh, I wonder when the next full moon is. What was her name again? I hope The Fourth was paying attention. Oh, no, he's not. He's picking at his fingernails.

3) Use my cast iron pan more - Because I feel like it would make me more Southern-y.

4) Go to the gym - This is more appropriately named: Read Garden & Gun magazine more. While lazily pedaling on a stationary bike.

5) Blog more - I think I just heard Ashley squeal. Now, the question is, will she blog more, too?

6) Keep my house clean - Or at least not apocalyptically disastrous. I would at least like to have the Christmas decorations down by Valentine's Day. The tree is getting crunchy.

7) Go somewhere warm this winter - And improve my tan while I'm there. Because my skin color is currently described as "Institution Wall White."

I think these should keep me busy until at least March. Now I'm off to go read a novel on the couch next to the Christmas tree and mountains of laundry.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

30 Days in 300 Words or Less

2011-01-05T14:50:00.002-05:00

A full month since I last posted. Sorry guys (especially Ashley!).

Here's what I've been up to in the least number of words possible:

Holiday Market - Fun. Tiring. Channeled my inner designer.

Christmas Eve - Steaks and Baked Potatoes. And Christmas Cookies. Heaven.

Christmas Day - Slept late with The Fourth. Like 10:30am late. Awwwesome.

Work - Too much lately. But can't wait for that Direct Deposit tonight.

New Year's Eve - Fail. The Fourth tried to steal cable; it didn't work. I worked until 10pm. Dixie Dog had stimulation overload and seized and lost a toenail in the process. Total fail.

New Year's Day - Work. But some major fun and majorly good collards that night with the McLeod's. I now love the board game Loaded Questions.

Blog - Neglected because of work-induced writer's block. Will get better soon!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

My Xmas Mix

2010-12-04T11:28:00.001-05:00

I'll admit it. I'm just flat obsessed with Christmas this year.

And, so. I've been listening to my most favorite mixed CD since October 1st.

Feel free to duplicate your own CD from these choices and see how wonderful it makes your holiday season!

Track 1: All I Want For Christmas Is You, Mariah Carey

I mean, really. Is there any better Christmas song this one? Mariah just totally nails the Christmas pop music on this number and I find myself singing along (badly) every time I hear it.

Favorite Lyric: "Baby, all I want for Christmas is yoooouuuu!"

Track 2: Christmas in Dixie, Alabama

I have lived in the South my whole life so I get a little confused by all the "White Christmas" hubba-baloo. The only white I want to see on Christmas Day is the sand on a beach. And that's what I love about this song, it's a true Southern Christmas Carol.

Favorite Lyric: "And maybe down in Memphis, Graceland's all in lights."

Track 3: Do They Know It's Christmas?, Various Artists with Band Aid

When you copy this super-awesome CD, I'd go ahead and leave this track out. I thought I would like an inspirational Christmas-round-the-world type song. But I don't. It's mostly whining about sending money to Africa. And it's from 1984. Eh.

Favorite Lyric: "And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas." Well, duh.

Track 4: Happy Xmas (War is Over), John Lennon and Yoko Ono

Now, this is an inspirational Christmas-round-the-world type song I like! And it makes me want to tell everyone "Happy Christmas" this year instead of "Merry Christmas." Isn't there something just so John Lennon-y about that? Maybe I'll get those little round glasses, too. Or not.

Favorite Lyric: "And so this is Christmas; for weak and for strong."

Track 5: Christmas Don't Be Late, Alvin & The Chipmunks

Oh, those crazy chipmunks. Did I ever tell you that Big Daddy (real name: Theodore) had a good friend named Alvin. True story. But where was Simon? I love the craziness of the song and the uber cuteness of those squeaky voices.

Favorite Lyric: "Me, I want a huuuula hoooop!"

Track 6: Ho, Ho, Ho & A Bottle of Rum, Jimmy Buffett

This song really speaks to my burning desire to spend Christmas on a tropical beach. I'm not really into Egg Nog, but I feel sure I'd enjoy a Miami Vice (pina colada and strawberry daiquiri, layered, in a glass) on Christmas Eve. I'd put lights in the palm trees, promise.

Favorite Lyric: "Plastic creations and crass exploitations aren't good. Santa wants to go back to simple toys made out of wood."

Track 7: Little Saint Nick, Beach Boys

Ah, a Beach Music song about Christmas. It pretty much sounds like every Beach Boys songs. Just with more references to Santa.

Favorite Lyric: "A real famous cat dressed all in red."

Track 8: Hanukkah Song, Adam Sandler

Okay, it's not a Christmas song. But how can you not like this song in December? It's just so so so funny. Comedic genius, really. I wish I was that funny...

Favorite Lyric: "Paul Newman's half Jewish. Goldie Hawn's half, too. Put them together; what a fine lookin' Jew!"

Track 9: Santa Baby, Eartha Kitt

A Christmas classic. A little creepy, to be honest, though. I'm not sure how I feel about a "Sexy Santa." This song also wins the award, "Most Likely To Be Remade On Every Singer's Christmas Album."

Favorite Lyric: "Santa, honey, I want a yacht. And that's really not a lot."

Track 10: Please Come Home for Christmas, Eagles

Favorite Lyric: "Friends and relations send salutations." {The word "salutations always makes me think of "Charlotte's Web.}

Track 11: Where Are You Christmas, Faith Hill

This song came from The Grinch movie where Jim Carrey's extensive make-up makes him look like a green pug. But this song is really great. And Faith Hill is pretty.

Favorite Lyric: "The joy of Christmas stays here inside us. Fills each and every heart with love."

Track 12: Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, Frank Sinatra

I have a guest towel that says this and every time I go to the bathroom, I end up with this song in my head. True story.

Favorite Lyric: "Hang a shining star upon the highest bough." {Bough just sounds so much prettier than branch, don't you think?}

Track 13: Santa Claus is Coming to Town, Jackson 5

Lil' Michael J. rocks this song out. Before he got plastic surgery crazy. And hanging kids off balconies.

Favorite Lyric: "Little tin drums and little toy drums. Rooty-toot-toot and Rump-a-tum-tum."

Track 14: How'd You Like to Spend Christmas on Christmas Island?, Jimmy Buffett

Oh, Jimmy. I do want to spend Christmas on Christmas Island! Take me, pleeeassse!

Favorite Lyric: "How'd ya like to stay up late like the islanders do? And wait for Santa to sail in with your presents in a canoe."

Track 15: Welcome Christmas, The Whos in Whoville

From the original Grinch movie where The Grinch's dog looks suspiciously like my own Dixie-Dog. Love when he puts a stick on his head for antlers. Dixie-Dog doesn't like it when I do that to her, though.

Favorite Lyric: "Fah who for-aze! Dah who dor-aze! Welcome Christmas, come this way!"

Track 16: Merry Christmas Baby, Otis Redding

By far, my favorite Christmas song! Otis, my man!

Favorite Lyric: "Santa came down the chimney. Half past three, ya'll!"

Track 17: I Want A Hippopotamus for Christmas, Some Little Kid

Who doesn't want a hippopotamus for Christmas? That little kid's voice kind of freaks me out, though.

Favorite Lyric: "Mom says the hippo would eat me up, but then Teacher says a hippo is a vegetarian."

Track 18: Merry Christmas From The Family, Robert Earl Keen

A true Southern Christmas anthem. The Fifth and Big Daddy live for this song during December. There are so many good lines, it was hard to find just one.

Favorite Lyric: "Little sis brought her new boyfriend. He was a Mexican. We didn't know what to think of him 'til he sang Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad!"

Track 19: Transiberian Orchestra

I'm not really sure which song this is, but it's definitely a rock-out Christmas song with electric guitars. And what's not to love about that??

Well, that's it! I hope this adds to the enjoyment of the holidays. {Can you name that movie line?}

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

No Invitation Necessary

2010-11-20T07:53:00.000-05:00

This fall has been packed with weddings for us (most recently: 2 weddings last weekend and 1 this Saturday).

And we're not really until football. Well, that's not true. We enjoy tailgating and the game of football, but this die-hard dedication is more than we can handle.

But we have friends that are die-hard. And I decided I wanted to go tailgate to one USC game this fall with them. So I invited myself.

I did butter them up with compliments of how fun they are, how much I'd like to meet their tailgating companions, how I'd bring my own food and drink and make appropriately hilarious jokes. Fortunately, they didn't seem too upset by my self-invite. That's just the kind of people Shawn and Elizabeth are!

Here are some pictures from the day:

Elizabeth (my gracious host) and me. This was the Alabama game and Elizabeth went to Alabama for undergrad. Hence the black houndstooth (plus, she's very fashionable).

Shawn, Elizabeth, me, and The Fourth. Shawn went to USC for law school and is sporting a USC shirt. They're a house divided (and, yes, they have the cheesy license plate that says so). The Fourth is wearing non-partisan navy blue. I appear to be the only one with a cup in my hand - awkward.

Another group shot. Once again, only one with a cup. And is it just me, or are my sunglasses obnoxiously gigantic?

The boys. Glad to see The Fourth and Shawn with drinks (told you I wasn't the only one).

As you can tell, this was some pretty swanky tailgating. Shady spot, inside bathrooms, big screen TV, cookie cake. You can tell when someone knows how to throw a party.

We did not have tickets to the game, so when everyone started heading to the game, The Fourth and I jumped in the golf cart (why, yes, we did take a golf cart to the game) and headed back home to take a nap. Told you we weren't die-hard.

But after our nap, we realized we were hungry. I noticed on Facebook that my friends Emily and Paul were setting up a tailgate at home to watch the game on TV. I, unabashedly, sent Emily a text immediately asking if we could join them. Yes, that's right, I invited myself to 2 parties in one day.

Because Emily is very gracious (and realized that she made a lot of food for just her and Paul), she let us come over.

It was awesome: Mexican dip, pigs in a blanket, beer (well, for some of us, Emily was uber pregnant at the time). And no one even mentioned our bad manners for showing up empty-handed.

It was such a fun day! I may just have to invite myself to parties more often. Speaking of, what are your plans tonight?

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Weird Fears

2010-11-19T22:50:00.000-05:00

I have some strange fears.

I've mentioned before how clowns totally freak me out before. (Just looking at that video when I posted the link made me shiver. And laugh. That mailman is a trip.)

But that seems to be a common fear (it even has a name: Coulrophobia).

There are some other ones that I have that are probably less common:

1. I'm scared that I will leave the gas hose in my car at the gas pump and I'll drive away. I will even check my mirror a couple times before I drive away. Although it's never happened to me before, I know that it can...

2. I worry that I will leave the house without earrings. Or as my mother would say, "With empty holes in my ears." Thus, I keep a spare pair in my car.

3. I also worry about forgetting mascara. So I keep that in the car, too. But it gets grody pretty fast, so I have to just use a cheap tube for "emergencies."

4. Ok, this is a weird one. The situation: I'll be watching the evening news and they're doing a report on obesity in America. And they show a street with fat people walking by, but they manage not to get their faces in the screen. And I'm watching this while munching on popcorn on my couch and think,

"Hey! I have that same sweater! And, um, those jeans look like mine, too. And, er, aren't those my boots? Oh. My. Gosh. Is my behind really that big?!?!"

If I see a camera crew on the sidewalk, you better believe that I'll be crossing the street pronto.

5. I freak out when people honk at me in the car. I won't even look over. I don't know if they're gangsters with guns, friends trying to say hello, or just strangers trying to tell me the gas pump is still in my car. I just don't want to find out.

6. I fear that in the ultimate battle of dog hair vs. me that is taking place in my home, I will lose. This is a very likely scenario.

7. I also worry that I will forget my passport while traveling. I have a special pocket in my carry-on for it and constantly reach in there to make sure it's there. The Fourth (who has virtually no worries) doesn't understand this and it totally aggravates him. I can't blame him. But I still worry I'll end up stranded in Vancouver, or somewhere equally scary.

So, it's tough to live in a world with so many fears. But I manage.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Glamour Shot

2010-11-18T13:21:00.002-05:00

What I think when I see this picture:

1. Oh, Claudia. I'm going to get you. Just you wait...

2. Do I always look like a deer in the headlights during Junior League meetings?

3. I'm glad Anna made me buy that expensive Smashbox eyebrow pencil. My brows look good!

4. I'm clearly not taking notes. Hope I didn't miss anything important.

5. Why, yes. That is a 24oz Coors Light. In a koozie.

6. I can explain #5: I was at the gas station when I realized I forgot beer to take to the meeting (and, obviously, I need alcohol for long meetings!). So, I picked up a beer at the gas station. And it's a deuce deuce.

7. Seconds after this picture was taken, I realized everyone was staring at me. Giggling. Oh, I'll get you all...

8. The Fifth will never let me forget this.

9. I love that animal print cardigan. I wish I had a couple of them.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

All Harry Potter, All The Time

2010-11-05T12:17:00.002-04:00

I have a new crush. He's younger than me, but seems to get older each day. He wears glasses, but in a cute way. And his hair has that tousled, just out of bed look.

The sad part?

He's not real. But we've been hanging out so much lately, I feel like he could be!

His name? Mr. Harry Potter.

Now, I'm not just meeting Harry for the first time. I jumped aboard the Hogwarts Express around the time that the 3rd book came out. My brother, The Fifth, read them from the beginning and literally grew up with Harry, Hermione and Ron. The series that The Fifth started reading in elementary school finally completed when he was in college. And don't think he didn't wait in line at midnight for that last book. 'Cause he did.

So I, being a wannabe Hogwarts student, always get waay too excited with each movie release and make sure to reread the book before the going to see the movie. This helps a lot because the movies tend to leave a lot out and there are often big gaping holes in the plot. I guess this is to prevent having 20 hour movies, but I think any good Gryffindor wouldn't mind sitting through it.

Well, the time has come for the final movie! And, after Warners Bros has finally taken my advice, they will be releasing it in two parts to include everything. The first part will be released on November 19th - HOOORRAAYYY!

Of course, The Fifth and I have been talking non-stop about how they will illustrate certain scenes on the big screen and have been negotiating times and dates to go check out the first installment. I told The Fifth that I wanted to reread The Deathly Hallows before going to see it in the Muggle theaters. And he suggested rereading all 7 books in order to really see how the plot develops in the series. He did this, of course, last summer in the span of about 2 weeks.

So, my dear blog readers, that is where I've been. Reading reading reading reading. I'm a pretty avid reader anyways, but I sort of have a deadline this time. Oh, and a job. Or two. And Holiday Market meetings.

The Fourth (my husband), who does not "get" Harry Potter, has said these sort of things:

"Isn't it a kid's book?"

"You know, it's not a huge deal if you don't finish before you go to see the movie."

"Haven't you already read all of these before?"

Well, yes, that is all true. But he didn't spend an entire year wondering if Snape really was still a Death Eater. Or if Ron would ever be good at Quidditch. Or whether Harry and Ginny would realize their true love. Or what really happened to Dumbledore. Or if Hagrid would be able to use magic again!

As of this morning, I'm on page 703 of the 5th book, Order of the Phoenix. Did I mention these are reallly long kid's books?

So, you'll have to excuse me as I delve further into Harry Potter's world and make references to Diagon Alley or Hogsmeade or even Clean Sweep 2000s. I just can't help it.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Embarrassing, but Funny.

2010-10-17T07:53:00.000-04:00

Don't you hate it when you think someone is taking a picture of you, but they're really taking a video and making you look like a fool??

Oh, just me, then?

I'll get you, Paul.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Purple is Popular This Year. Right? RIGHT??

2010-10-16T07:38:00.000-04:00

I have done a little Fall shopping to update my wardrobe. In one of my few OCD ways, I hang my clothes in my closet by color.

Turns out I'm really into purple this year.

Huh.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

PS: The Fourth gave me amethyst earrings for my birthday. Seems a love for purple is contagious.

PPS: I'm not the only who's wearing a lot of purple. (Ahem, Bebe and Margaret.)

PPPS: Purple is a sign of royalty. And Barney. I'll go with the first one.

PPPPS: In retrospect, I should have just written all of this in the post instead of all the PS's.

PPPPPS: But aren't PS's fun?!

MD Says The Darndest Things

2010-10-15T11:22:00.002-04:00

In the past couple weeks, I have said some pretty funny things that made me realize I am probably not ready to raise children.

A couple of the better ones:

{Looking at a 6 month old}
"So, what sort of tricks does she do now?"
Lesson Learned: Kids learn skills. Puppies learn tricks.

Setting: Meeting with lots of mommas in attendance
Discussion: How to make the pictures with Santa go quicker at an upcoming Holiday party.
"Oh! I got it! Let's have 2 Santas and the lines will go twice as fast!"
Lesson Learned: Kids will have to go to therapy later in life if they go to a party with 2 Santas.

Setting: Hanging out with friends at their house. Their babies are asleep in the other room.
Discussion: Going on a ride in the new car.
"Just come on with us! The kids are sleeping; it's not like they'll go anywhere!"
Lesson Learned: It is true they won't go anywhere. This also includes not being able to get out if there was a fire/flood/burglary/etc. Don't leave your kids alone in the house unless you want to show up on the evening news the next day.

Setting: Baby Shower. The momma-to-be opens a gift that is a breast pump.
"Oh dear Lord."
Lesson Learned: Breast pumps are very very scary. And look like the machinery at the cow barn at the zoo.

I'm sure I'll learn all this one day. Or not; and just keep laughing through it all.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Dinner Tonight!

2010-09-27T18:15:00.003-04:00

My family grew up making a delicious side dish: Brown Rice.

It goes with just about everything, but was definitely our go-to starch side with chicken and pork. We ate so much rice in our family there was often reflections on how we very well could be Asian.

When I was first dating The Fourth, he wanted to cook dinner for me one night. Chicken, butter beans, and brown rice. I remember that I had been working all day and was thrilled to come home to a home-cooked meal. Chicken, delicious. Butter beans, personal favorite. Brown rice... {eccchhh!} I spit it out! The rice is bad!! It tastes like burnt popcorn!

That is when I found out that The Fourth's family has a different idea of brown rice than my family. They make the uber-healthy brown rice. I like it okay now, but it was definitely not what I was expecting.

Here is how we make delicious brown rice:

Melt 1 stick of butter in pan.

Yep, 1 stick.

Even if it's just 2 of you.

Trust me, butter makes everything delicious. Ever had anything made by Paula Deen??

Have you ever seen how that woman makes sweet peas? 1 cup of LeSueur peas to 1 stick of butter. Good stuff. Would be pretty good with this rice, actually.

Anyhoo. Once butter is all melty delicious, add 1 cup of rice. Saute until white. Yes, I know rice is already white, but it gets more white. You'll see.

Also - if you want to get gourmet, add chopped onions and/or mushrooms before you add the rice. Cook until the onions are clear. Sometimes I do this step and sometimes I don't. Mostly depends on if I have onions and mushrooms (usually canned ones) in the pantry.

Okay, now that you have whiter white rice, add a can of beef consomme soup. This is just canned beefy deliciousness. Add about 1/2 - 3/4 a can of water, too, so the rice won't dry out.

Bring back to a boil.

Pour (carefully; it is boiling after all) into a Pyrex dish.

Bake at 350 for 35-40 minutes. Until the rice is not crunchy and all the butter/beefy deliciousness soup is absorbed.

Enjoy immensely.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Current Events

2010-09-23T20:31:00.006-04:00

It's been fun couple weeks. I know you're dying to find out, so I'm ready to give you little pictorial history:

We went to wedding in a big city.

And met up with great friend.

Who we enjoyed pork belly and mussels with. Know what pork belly is? The white fatty part of bacon. Know how delicious it is? Very! It's like you know it's oh so wrong to eat it, but you just can't seem to stop.

And the wedding was fun. I danced with the groom. (Look at my moves! Woo!)

And we got a little sweaty from dancing.

But it was just so much fun. And there was champagne. Good champagne.

And then we went to the beach. With friends who like to drink on the beach.

Don't go calling DSS on my pregnant friend. It's non-alcoholic. They brew it and then take out all the fun....er, I mean alcohol.

Then we went to another wedding. An old friend. Well, she's not old. She's my age. But I have a feeling I've known her longer than any other person who I don't share DNA with.

Pretty girls right?

And we tried to take a Christmas card picture.

And, uh, Big Daddy seemed to have the camera on "crooked mode."

Then I had a birthday party!

And it seems I didn't realize I was the only one drinking... Huh.

And we had fondue!

And then we went back to the beach with friends. Well, a different beach. And different friends. But same idea.

And everyone was allowed to ride in the wagon.

Pretty exciting time!

So what does the next couple weeks have in store for us? Weddings, beach with friends, lots of fun and parties. Basically all the same stuff!

I can't wait.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

I'm No Jenny Craig

2010-09-21T16:30:00.002-04:00

Sadly, this is actually how I think...

6:02am - "Yay! Look at me! Getting up to walk! I am sooo healthy!"
6:38am - "Good God, it's hot. Fall?! Where are you?!"
7:10am - "Ugggghhh. Tomorrow is fall and I have soaked through a tank top. Walking."
7:12am - "Huh. I wonder how much I weigh."
7:13am - "Hm. My hair is wet. Must be adding to the scale."
7:38am - "Showered. Dried hair. Now how much do I weigh??"
7:39am - "I blame The Fourth for all this weight gained since we got married."
7:40am - "I am going to eat a granola bar for breakfast and I WILL NOT snack before lunch!"
10:40am - "Oh my Gooooooood. I'm staaaarrrrving!"
10:41am - "Okay, I'm just going to break down and eat these peanut butter filled pretzels. Because, really? Who can even resist peanut butter filled pretzels??"
10:42am - "And a La Croix. But it's zero calorie, fat, everything, so it barely counts."
10:43am - "Ahhhh...Pamplemousse."
12:00pm (on the dot) - "Lunch time!!!!"
12:30pm - "I remember when I used to not like mayonnaise on my sandwiches. I also remember weighing less than 110 pounds. Coincidence? I think not."
1:20pm - "I need to go to Target for pet stain carpet cleaner (Uh, don't tell The Fourth...). I'll walk. Because I'm so healthy!!"
1:35pm - "It sounds impressive that I walked to Target. Too bad it's just across the street. Big parking lot, though."
1:40pm - "Ooooh. Icees!"
1:41pm - "No, no, no, no! I didn't burn enough calories on my walk across the parking lot to get an Icee."
1:42pm - "Ooooh. Popcorn!"
1:43pm - "No, no, no, no!"
1:44pm - "Okay, I'll compromise. No popcorn. But yes Icee."
1:45pm - "One cherry Icee please!"
1:56pm - "Sllluuuuurrrrppp."
2:56pm - "Hm, it's awfully hot."
2:57pm - "Hey The Fourth! Could you pick me up? Yep, the Target right across the street. Yes, I know it's hot; that's why I'm calling!"
3:08pm - "Thanks for picking me up! Want to make some popcorn when we get home?!"

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night...

2010-09-20T20:36:00.004-04:00

I'm just going to go ahead and put it out there.

I do not like white sunglasses. There is just something about them that reeks of the Jersey Shore.

See, told you.

But, really. Most people can not pull it off. And, by "most people," I mean: everyone I've ever seen trying to pull them off. Now, I feel sure that I have some friends out there with white sunglasses. Don't be offended. I'm sure I wear some unfortunate things, too. (But, I don't think I do. So whatever.)

I know a lot of people feel this way about aviators. But I gotta tell you, I love my aviators. I like to think I look like Tami from Friday Night Lights (who is, by the way, the best actress on TV! Small, but consuming, obsession with how great she is!)

Just in case you were confused, this picture is actually of Tami (aka Connie Britton) and not me. But I look almost that good. Almost.

The good thing is: I usually sit/run over/lose/scratch/break my sunglasses on a regular basis, so any sunglasses I own are only temporary. I just don't own any white ones. No matter how temporary.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Snooki picture from blogue.us

Tami picture from womenandhollywood.com

Le Deliciousness

2010-09-09T22:15:00.003-04:00

I'm not really sure how long this drink has been around, but I have a new found love!

Ahhhh, La Croix.

I pronounce it "La Croy" but I actually have no clue how to say it. The Fourth calls it "La Gross." I don't know what his problem is, because this drink is ah-mazing!

Sparkling water. A vague flavor of lime, berry, orange, or (my personal favorite) grapefruit. Which, by the way, is labeled with the French word for grapefruit: Pamplemousse. I can assure you I remind everyone of this flavor while I'm drinking that one!

"I love Pamplemousse! That's grapefruit, by the way, for you non-Frenchians!" (What?! Frenchian is a person who resides in France. Duh.)

The only one that The Fourth tried was the orange flavor. I guess he was expecting Orange Crush or something, but he definitely spit it out in the sink.

I started drinking La Croix this summer at the beach when I wanted something sparklely on the beach, but not necessarily beer at 9:30am. (To be noted, I am not against drinking beer at 9:30 in the morning. But I had some serious reading to do!)

Now, if only they made a caffeine infused one for me to drink when I hit that mid-afternoon sludge. That would be le amazing.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Ew, malt liquor.

2010-09-06T22:08:00.006-04:00

Um, has anyone else seen this commercial??

Mike's Hard Lemonade Commercial

When I saw this commercial, this was basically my thought process:

Wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT! They are marketing Mike's Hard Lemonade to men now??

Mike's Hard Lemonade - what we used to drink in college until the freshmen started making fun of us?*

The lemonade flavored malt liquor?? That gives you terrible gut rot?

The lemonade alcohol that is just a short step away from Zima?**

Is this all in an effort to compete with Smirnoff Ice because of that game all boys seem to be playing right now??***

Don't worry, you will not catch me or The Fourth with a Mike's Hard Lemonade in our hands. Even if they do have the labels that copy Coors Light bottles.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

* Um, not that we drank underage. We stopped drinking MHL and changed to White Zinfandel. You know, to class it up.

** Do they even still make Zima?? Did anyone else put Jolly Ranchers in their Zimas? No? Just me trying to make an extra sugary drink?

*** Really, guys, "You Got Iced" is ridiculous. Funny. But ridiculous.

Popcorn with Orville

2010-09-01T07:00:00.000-04:00

I grew up on microwave popcorn. It was always a popular after-school snack and, really, I can eat a whole bag even after dinner. I know it's just empty calories that serve as a vehicle for butter and salt, but, hey! I like butter and salt!

We did not cook kernels on the stove. I imagine we maybe did Jiffy Pop once or twice, but my only memories of popcorn kernels were the multi-colored ones we glued on pinecones as cheap Christmas ornaments. By the way, what kind of terrible Christmas ornament is that?? And did anyone else even make those? And, the most important question, why are these cheap-o crafts still in the ornament box at Big Daddy's house?

Side story - The Fourth's family has a whole bunch of ornaments on their tree that are the school picture glued to the fast food restaurant ashtray variety. Remember making those? And how funny is it that kids today have no clue that you could smoke in McDonald's back in the day? Ah, that shows our age doesn't it?

Anyways, all of those ramblings are to get to this point: The Fourth and I made popcorn on the stove this week! Who knew we could even do that??

This past Christmas, The Fourth got some Anson Mills popcorn in his stocking. And, since we didn't really know what to do with it, it sat on our shelf for the following 8 months. The Fourth likes late night microwave popcorn as much as I do and was hunting through the pantry for some one night. He came up empty handed and then eyed the bag of kernels. I guess I was feeling adventurous (or just hungry), so I Googled "how to make popcorn on the stove."

Here's what Elise on simplyrecipes.com told me to do:

1. Heat the oil in a 3-quart saucepan on medium high heat.

2. Put 3 or 4 popcorn kernels into the oil and cover the pan.

3. When the kernels pop, add the rest of the 1/3 cup of popcorn kernels in an even layer. Cover, remove from heat and count 30 seconds. (Count out loud; it's fun!) This method first heats the oil to the right temperature, then waiting 30 seconds brings all of the other kernels to a near-popping temperature so that when they are put back on the heat, they all pop at about the same time.

4. Return the pan to the heat. The popcorn should begin popping soon, and all at once. Once the popping starts in earnest, gently shake the pan by moving it back and forth over the burner. Try to keep the lid slightly ajar to let the steam from the popcorn release (the popcorn will be drier and crisper). Once the popping slows to several seconds between pops, remove the pan from the heat, remove the lid, and dump the popcorn immediately into a wide bowl.
With this technique, nearly all of the kernels pop and nothing burns.

5. If you are adding butter (Mary Douglass' opinion: which, obviously is the whole point), you can easily melt it by placing the butter in the now empty, but hot pan.

6. Salt to taste. (Mary Douglass' opinion: which means a lot of salt!)

I gotta say, it was delicious!! And we have made homemade popcorn 4 times since. I would definitely recommend spray butter for maximum buttery coverage.

Did I mention that The Fourth's first name is Orville? Mr. Redenbacher just got a run for his money...

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Summer Reading

2010-08-31T15:47:00.000-04:00

I did not blog at the beach mostly because I was too busy reading. (Well, and if I blogged after all of the "vacation drinking," then my posts would be rambling, incoherent and possibly too snarky.)

So here's the list of books I read while at the beach and my reviews.

1. Midwives, by Chris Bohjalian - This novel was one of Oprah's Book Club picks. And just like the rest of Oprah's Book Club picks, I did not really like it. I get confused when a book has too many flashbacks and the plot is complicated. How about just tell me the story in the order that it happened, mkay?

The story about the midwife was pretty interesting and would be a good topic for a book club. That being said, I am very "pro-hospital" when the baby time comes and have no intentions of having a kid in the baby pool at my house. I feel sure that The Fourth is very glad of this decision.

2. Washington Schlepped Here, by Christopher Buckley - I read this book in anticipation for our trip to Washington, DC. What a great tour book it proved to be! Great suggestions of what to see and what to avoid and why things are they way they are in DC. (For example: Prostitutes are known as "hookers" because General Hooker kept a house of girls for early politicians near the Capitol and they were known as "Hooker's Brigade." Fun (if not totally appropiate) fact for your next cocktail party in DC.) And the writing was funny enough to make me enjoy reading a tour book. The author also wrote Thank You For Smoking - which is a really funny movie! - and I plan on reading more of his books.

3. Just One Look, Harlan Coben - I am now hooked on Harlen Coben's books! Suspenseful, funny, great characters. I think I'll add him to my "List of Authors That I Could Read Every Single Book They Write." Also included in this list: Michael Crichton, Patricia Cornwell, JK Rowling, Pat Conroy, Celia Rivernbark, Steve Berry. Jodi Picoult used to be on this list until I read Second Glance and then half of Mercy. Oh, I just could not finish Mercy. So very bad and so very long.

4. Cruel and Unusual, Patricia Cornwell - As noted above, I just love Patricia Cornwell. I started reading her books after I blew through all of Kathy Reich's books (which I still prefer a little bit more than PC's. I just like Temperance Brennan more than Kay Scarpetta.) Maybe I should have been a forensic scientist instead of a pharmacist. But then I'd have to touch people which is the main reason I didn't go to med school. At my job now, I can stand behind a counter at the pharmacy and not have to touch any of the general public which, I admit, is pretty nice. And they'd be dead people if I was in forensics, which is also icky.

5. Tell No One, Harlan Coben - Lara of In The Loop fame recommended this Harlen Coben novel. Except everytime she said the title, she whispered it. "Oh yeah, you should totally read 'Tell No One'. You'll love it!" It certainly added to the mystery of the book. And now, of course, I can't seem to say the title without whispering it. Watch, it'll happen to you, too.

6. The Double Bind, Chris Bohjalian - Considering how much I loved Secrets of Eden, I thought I would love this book. It was okay. I did like it more after talking about it with Lara and Graham, though, so I think it would make a great book club book. (Just not my book club, since I already read it and all...) And it's definitely the kind of book with such a twist at the end, you immediately want to read it over again to pick up on all the clues you totally missed the first time. Which always makes for a good read.

And if you've read any of these books, track me down so we can chat about them!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

A Week at the Beach

2010-08-18T11:00:00.000-04:00

There are few places better on this earth than Sunset Beach, NC. I was lucky enough to get to spend 8 glorious days there on our family vacation. Well, sort of family vacation. The Fifth (my brother) had to work so it was really just Big Daddy, me and The Fourth. And, of course, my fat and furry sister: Lilly, my fat and furry estranged daughter: Dixie, and my step-dog: Bailey.

But just because it was vacation doesn't mean I took a vacation from learning. Here are some of the more important lessons I learned:

* It is not required to have a tattoo on the beach, but it is highly recommended. If you, like me, do not have a tattoo, you will be in the very small minority. As Jimmy Buffett so accurately described them, "It's a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling."

* The sun is hot and you will get burned in August. To all the tourists who were smirking at how much sunscreen I reapplied and then were later beet red the rest of the week -- Ha. Ha. Ha.

* 9:30am is not too early to start drinking beer on the beach. It is too early to start drinking at work, though. Noted.

* There is no limit to the number of naps you can take while on vacation. This is true for pets and husbands.

* If you wait until the last day of vacation to take pictures, it will be overcast and rainy. And so, I have almost no pictures from the beach. Sigh. (To be honest, though, I knew I would never be able to get The Fourth and Big Daddy into white shirts and khakis to take pictures by the dunes. They are just not that accommodating.)

* Although it's not like Fripp Island, there are deer on Sunset Beach. But Sunset is an island...so the question is: Can deer swim?!

Going back to work after the beach was difficult. I was not happy for at least a week. And now all I can wonder is: When can we go back?!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

I Just Don't Get It

2010-07-28T07:00:00.002-04:00

It's not unusual that I'm out of the loop on a trend. I remember being in middle school and everyone singing "Hard Knock Life." I was so excited to see a resurgence in the musical Annie. Turns out my classmates were more interested in a rapper named Jay-Z than a kind and childless millionaire named Daddy Warbucks.

But now in 2010 there is Facebook to make me feel more out of touch when I see every single person posting about something I have no idea about.

A few examples:

* Mad Men. It's not unusual for me to be behind on a TV show. In fact, as I write this, The Fourth and I are watching the first season of 24 and it's already off the air by now. But when I log on Facebook on Sunday night (to see all the photo documentation of the debauchery that occurred over the weekend), I am bombarded by everyone talking about Don Draper. Naturally, I Facebook searched this Don Draper to see who the heck this guy was. It was more than a little disappointing to see he was a character a TV show and not a real person. And on a channel we don't even get! Looks like we'll be adding "Mad Men" to our Netflix queue. But it's going behind the rest of "24" and the newest season of "My Boys."

* Hands on Hips. Okay, we all know the trick of putting one foot forward and a hand on your hip to make yourself look slimmer in a photograph. If you've seen one Miss America pageant, you know this to be true. But the pictures of girls with hands on hips is getting out of control. When I was in college, everyone took the Squeeze Picture (you know what I'm talking about: 2 girls squeezing the ever living breath out of each other. My parents would joke that you could tell how late the picture was taken by how hard I was squeezing the person in the picture. This could be true.) But now I feel like I can't look at one picture without at least half the girls with this hand on hip thing going. I even saw one picture of at least 8 girls in a line all with their elbows poking out. It looked like a bad beauty pageant -- you know, like Miss USA or something.
As a side note, I tend to stand with my hands on my hips whether someone is taking a picture or not. I hear it's a Hayne thing, but I call it my Power Stance. If you ever see me in the background of the picture, there's a 98% chance I have both my elbows at 45 degrees.

* The Bachelor/Bachelorette. So it's another TV show we don't watch, but this one even comes on a non-cable station. I'll admit it, I watched The Bachelor in college. But no one liked to watch it with me because I would point out all the fundamental flaws:

"Well, true love is forsaking all others. So how can he be in love with all 3 of the remaining girls?!"

"Really, Chris Harrison, this is the last rose?? I am so glad that you were there to point out the most obvious observation since we've been waiting for this moment for 55 minutes."

"I mean, how could you not fall in love in Maui in a glamorous suite?? I'd fall in love with a troll if he took me on a helicopter ride over the Hawaiian volcanoes."

See what I mean? Annoying. I don't think The Fourth is too upset that I'm not hogging the remote to watch this show.

* The Iphone. I am always behind on technology anyways (I don't even have an Ipod and I've had the same CD stuck in my car's CD player for several years), but come on people! The Iphone is not sliced bread. And you paid a small fortune for a telephone that doesn't even work when you have your finger on the side....ridiculous! When you tell me about all the cool apps and then show me your favorite one that makes a series of pooting sounds, I can not possibly take you seriously.

* Girls in Guy Harvey Shirts. I love a boy in a fishing shirt. In fact, I love it so much, I have given the T-shirt of the Month to The Fourth on 2 different occasions. Sure, he gets some grief from his rich friends who have actually been on the boats featured on the shirts, but the way he goes through white t-shirts, I had to order them in bulk. But lately I've been seeing a bunch of teeny bopper girls in Guy Harvey shirts. Um, I highly doubt that you (with the teal ribbon tied on your pony tail) have ever been deep sea fishing. Because I have. And it sucked. Another post for another day.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

That picture is from Blue Water Shirt Company. I highly recommend joining the club (there are several plans available) if your husband likes fish or changes t-shirts more often than he changes his underwear. I did not get paid for this endorsement, but would not be against some free shirts if Blue Water would like to send me some (ahem, Blue Water...)

It Ain't Easy Being Green

2010-07-27T07:00:00.000-04:00

Earlier this summer I met this little guy at the Lake Box. He was right by the front steps and I slightly panicked when I almost crushed him with my flip flop.

And just about every night that we've been up there, I've seen him in the same spot. I'm think he's happy because we seem to have about 5 billion bugs up there and I'm sure it's a little froggy smorgasbord for him.

Last night I managed to get this picture of him on my cell phone. Isn't he cute?? I think I want to name him Kermit, but I'd be up for better suggestions.

And I may or may not have watched him for a large amount of time hoping to see his tongue fly out to catch a bug. (Incidentally, I never saw it. Maybe next time.)

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

The Fourth of July

2010-07-26T20:30:00.000-04:00

Subtitle: In which we all find out we're related.

It's a common thing in South Carolina to meet someone, play the name game, and then realize you are, in fact, 2nd cousins.

I have a whole gaggle of cousins with the last name "Smith" -- both of my grandmother's sisters married Smith boys. And, so, the very first night that I met The Fourth and found out his last name was "Smith," I quickly asked him if he had any family in Lee County. He didn't even know where it was on the map (Did I mention he was a geography major??), so I felt like I was in the clear. It may be legal in South Carolina to marry your second cousin, but that doesn't mean I want to. I want my kids to be smart, you know?

This 4th of July we celebrated in true American form. At the lake with lots of cold beer and pimento cheese dip. And after a couple introductions, we figured out we're all related.

My friend Katherine (whose maiden name was Smith, incidentally) is my 3rd cousin. Turns out it has nothing to do with the Smith cousins, but she's got Mozingo family and with a name like that, you know you're kin.

Then Katherine met Tad and discovered that Katherine's mom dated Tad's dad. That makes them siblings, once removed. Or something like that.

There were a lot more connections, but with all the beer and pimento cheese dip, one should not be required to remember these things.

But here's a funny picture of Tad falling off the "everywhere chair" on the boat and becoming a cockroach; enjoy!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

PS: I realize it's July 26th and I'm just now blogging about July 4th. You can blame/thank Bebe, Margaret and Ashley for making me feel bad for being so behind on blogging and writing about an event that happened almost a month ago. So there.

Rocking the Dock Indeed

2010-07-20T20:50:00.008-04:00

There are times in my life when I like to do something totally redneck. Like going to the State Fair. And one time in college I went to the Redneck Shop in Laurens to get a belt buckle for a Dukes of Hazzard party.

To be clear, though, I would never be caught dead at the Dolly Stampede. I've got standards. And I don't like dust in my food. (Although I do think it would be awesome to go and make Big Daddy be on the North's side. Watching the full body tremors might make it all worth it.)

Nevertheless, The Fourth and I and my Cute Friend Elizabeth went to Rock the Dock this weekend at Lake Murray. Now, the fact that there is a party on the lake does not inherently make it a blue collar affair. But when 1000 people show up and 98% of them have tattoos...well, it wasn't all sunburn causing the red necks.

And there were several signs that there were some serious Dixie-enthusiasts. For example, this boat had a flag that labeled them as "The Booty Patrol." Ah, yes. Those infamous Pirates of Lake Murray and their Booty Patrol.

It should be noted that there was a girl on that boat with little cotton shorts that had "Soul Sister" on the behind. Think she got those at Coplon's?? Hm, perhaps not.

We also spotted a deck boat with so many people on it (ugh, can you imagine the skin-to-skin contact?!) that the back started taking on water and sinking. And no one even seemed to notice. I think Wild Turkey may have been a factor...

That is a boat that looks like a carport:

And that is what we call a "cigarette boat." Because they are just as obnoxious and white trash as cigarettes. And yes, that guy is all by himself. Sad.

Just let us know if you'd like to come with us next year! I'll definitely be back on the O$$IV tuna tower with binoculars in hand!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Uninvited Houseguest

2010-07-06T21:12:00.003-04:00

I have a problem with pets not paying rent. I mean, if I'm going feed you, house you, brush your hair and bathe you, I really think you should start pulling your own weight. This does not bode well for me having kids one day. I'm hoping that selflessness comes with diapers and bottles and other baby stuff.

Fortunately for my step-dog, Bailey, he has sweet puppy-dog eyes, so I let him get away with a lot.

But it turns out we have another non-paying squatter. And he's not half as cute. Mostly because he has a hairless tail. Ew.

We first saw the little jerk outside skittering about one night. And then I came home one day and noticed that the dog food bag was lower. And saw this:

That is gnawing marks. Ew ew ew. And I'm pretty sure means that this is no furry little mouse. This is a monster. Which now means -- This is war.

First step - set up traps. I looked at the store for a trap that maybe had a little door that closed when the rat was inside and a light turns on to let me know when it's time to throw it away. Believe it or not, they actually make these, but only for tiny genetic testing type mice. Not monster-sized, eat-a-whole-bag of dog food rat.

Then I looked some of the kill-them-when-they-eat-them nuggets, but The Fourth worried about the Sasquatch rodent dying under the house and having to find him later when he as all stinky. Good point.

Big Daddy recommended those sticky papers, but the thought of having to smash a rat with my shoe was a little too much for me. And I'm fairly sure this rat would fight back.

So I made The Fourth go find something along the lines of a bear claw.

He did find one and, since he has a tendency to fidget with things, promptly clamped his fingers in it while he was talking to me. After about 20 minutes of full-guffawing on my part I was able to get it together to help him find peanut butter to load the trap. Then I got giggled again so had to wipe tears from my eyes before I was any help.

And that was 2 weeks ago. I am thinking of renaming Sasquatch to Molly Brown. This crafty little booger actually gets the treat out of the trap without setting it off! And my college-educated husband couldn't even keep from getting snapped in it.

We even saw his little paw prints on the trap. Ugh, and I hate creature paws. The thought of little black raccoon paws send shivers down my spine. Aauugghh...thinking about it now! {full body shivers}

I am, of course, all about calling a professional. But The Fourth comes from a family that does everything for themselves including renting heavy equipment and such. I come from a family that calls a plumber for a drain clog.

And so the war continues. Let's just hope the only casualty is the rat.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Take Notes

2010-06-30T07:12:00.000-04:00

I got the best thank you note this week! Since I didn't really ask permission to post it to the world (or, well, the 8 people who read my blog), I won't say who it was from. But her name rhymes with "Telly" and we recently went to their wedding. Ahem.

Anyhoo, I was thoroughly impressed by the note and wanted to make sure everyone saw how to write a truly wonderful, thought out, personal note. None of my thank you notes in the past have compared to this one, but I hope to reach to this level one day.

I will rewrite the note here with my own snarky comments (noted like this).

Stan & Mary Douglass -

First of all, the two of you are HUH-LARIOUS! (yes that was in all caps and spelled just that way. You can actually hear her saying it) I have so enjoyed getting to know you and can't tell you how many times "Groom" (changed to protect the innocent) and I (correct use of "and I") have talked about how cool it would be if ya'll lived in Charleston. (Could be cool, but will be very very hard for me to ever leave Columbia. Just saying.) You'd love it here, I promise! Just think about it, K? (Cute, right?)

And we love love LOVE (yes, there were 3 loves) the fabulous Annie Glass bowl! (Yes, well, Annie Glass does make for a perfect wedding gift) Seriously, "Groom" will tell you, it's one of my top 5 favorite gifts! (Whether this is actually true or not, I enjoy hearing it. Nothing wrong with lying in a thank you note) MD - I sure wish I talked to you before we registered! (I'd still be interested in a little post-wedding registering for anniversary/birthday/whatever else gifts!) I've been to their website numerous times and Matt promised that we can go to Nonesuch to "look" the next time we're in Columbia...as God as my witness, I need that Gold Roman Antique collection. I LOVE IT!! (Ah, yes, I'm not against having several different china patterns. In fact, I think I could usually a little God Roman Antique in my own china cabinet.)

Thank you for the fabulous gift and thank you for being there for us on our special day. (And, you're most welcome, "Telly") It was a magical weekend - perfect in every way - especially with the two of you by our side. Looking forward to many more celebrations with ya'll in the coming years. (Yes, yes we will) Which reminds me, what are your July 4th plans??

We love ya'll! "Telly" and "Groom"

PS: MD - The "I hat you" blog made me laugh so hard that a little bit of pee came out. Yes, I said "pee" in a thank you note but I speak the truth. (I don't care if she was lying, that's funny!)

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you write a thank you note!!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Not your normal Christmas tree shaped air freshener

2010-06-29T19:58:00.003-04:00

Just pick one of Big Daddy's smell-a-licious gardenias and stick in your air conditioning vent.

And...ahhhhh...

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

100th Post!

2010-06-15T21:45:00.000-04:00

Wow, I can't believe it! I've made it to my 100th post!!

I started this blog when I was lonely while The Fourth was off renting golf carts last summer. By the way, we still rent golf carts: http://www.oceanislecartrentals.com/ Rent a bunch of them so we can both quit our day jobs and I can blog a whole lot more...okay??

So, in honor of my 100th post, I wanted to let you know 100 things about me. Buckle your seat belts, this is going to be a wild (and impossibly long) ride!

1. I was born in Greenville, SC.

2. The night I was born, the hospital caught on fire. True story. I'm HOTT.

3. I would tell you my favorite color is blue.

4. But if you looked in my purse right now, I have a pink wallet, pink agenda and pink Bible (or, what I like to call, my Barbie Bible.)

5. I did honors research in college, but only because I wanted my diploma to say "With Honors."

6. I watched Sesame Street far too long as a child. As in, until 6th grade. What sort of 6th grader still needs to learn her vowels? But I can say the alphabet backwards; so there's that.

7. I bought the 1st wedding dress I tried on.

8. I know my library card number by heart.

9. I am not tidy. I'd much rather blog/watch Netflix/read/anything else than clean my house.

10. My coffee addiction has reached new heights. I now drink 16 oz on the way to work and another 16 oz once I get to work.

11. I used to drink my coffee with just 1 Sweet & Low. But now I have French Vanilla creamer and several packs of Sweet & Low. I've gotten soft.

12. I have absolutely no artistic ability.

13. I have a not-so-secret obsession with chili cheese tots from Sonic. They will change your life, for sure.

14. I have babysat the same Little Darling just about every week for the past 6 years.

15. I can type really fast. I was the fastest typer in my computer class in high school. I attribute this to AOL Instant Messenger.

16. I have never bought any piece of clothing for full retail price.

17. I used to love Southern Living until I discovered they considered Washington, DC part of the south. I have since cancelled my subscription.

18. I believe Saky is the best sushi restaurant in Columbia. Hands down. Who cares if the walls are concrete block??

19. I wear my Danskos every day to work. Otherwise I get weird foot cramps that put me in a bad mood.

20. I take up almost the entire bed when I sleep. But I really don't feel bad about this.

21. I brush my teeth the exact same way every time.

22. I named my dog "Dixie." It was between "Maggie" (short for Magnolia) or "Dixie." But on the way home from picking her up, Alabama's "Dixieland Delight" came on the radio. I felt like fate made the choice for me.

23. Big Daddy bought my mustang for me when my mom was out of town - I was supposed to get a used Saturn. All her friends still call me "Mustang Sally."

24. I started my china and silver patterns before I was engaged. I only wish I had started sooner!

25. My comfort food is pasta.

26. I worked in admissions at the hospital for 6 years during holidays and the summers. I've seen it all, people!

27. My mom wrote me every day in college. I even had a letter in my mailbox on my first day that she had sent before I even left.

28. My favorite number is 16. My birthday and anniversary both fall on the 16th. Maybe I should have made this my #16 instead of #28.

29. I have an abnormal obsession with feta cheese. I buy it at Sam's. Enough said.

30. I am always on the search for the perfect throw pillow. I'm really wanting a yellow and brown fun pattern, but this somehow does not exist.

31. My vision is frighteningly bad. At my last appointment, I couldn't even see the big E. Sigh.

32. I picked hydrangeas from my neighbor's yard the other night to put around my house. (This isn't considered stealing if the house is vacant, is it??)

33. I love Sunset Beach. I consider all other beaches inferior.

34. I have had the same CD stuck in my car CD player for 6 years. I am pretty sick of it, but have made no real attempts to get it out.

35. My hair looks really weird when I part it on the left side.

36. I'm freakishly hot-natured.

37. I had a vicious stomach bug 2 weeks before I got married and the week I was supposed to be taking my law part of the pharmacy boards. Panicked? Uh, yes. Thank God for Cipro. And quick weight loss right before getting married...

38. The Fourth & I went to the same dentist growing up. Weird, right?

39. I rarely answer my phone. Unless Big Daddy or The Fourth is calling me. Everyone else I just screen and ignore.

40. I am slightly freaked out by horses. I have not been up close to a mini-horse, but I'd be willing to give them a chance.

41. My Southern accent gets substantially worse around people without them.

42. I put pepper on my microwave popcorn.

43. I am not into the mountains or skiing. Don't even invite me.

44. I love Van Morrison! I really wanted to dance to one of his songs as our "First Dance," but thought "Crazy Love" just sounded inappropiate.

45. I used to love The Today Show and watched it every morning. Is it just me or has it just gotten silly?

46. My brother, The Fifth, and I love to recite TV and movie lines back and forth. It drives everyone else around us crazy.

47. Every New Year's I make a resolution to stop interrupting in conversations. And I always break it, uh, immediately. I'm not meaning to be rude; I just get so excited in the conversation!

48. I feel like this list is a little like the "25 Random Things" that went around Facebook last year. Did it make anyone else insane when someone wrote "I love my husband!"? I mean, duh, that shouldn't be a "random" revelation about you.

49. I wore fake eyelashes a bunch when I went out in college. I'm thinking I need to revisit this because my eyelashes are looking a little stumpy.

50. Uh, I didn't really realize how long this post could really get! How about we take a break until the next post for the last 50?!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

100th Post - 2nd Edition

2010-06-15T21:30:00.009-04:00

Whew! Did that last list just wear you out?! I won't be offended if you just skip this one. Actually, I'd probably be really offended, but technically I won't even know if you don't read it.

51. I had never seen the movie Jurassic Park until 2008 when The Fourth finally made me watch it. It was pretty good.

52. The Fourth is a much better shagger than me. He says I lead too much (but I have a feeling that this could be said about our relationship, too).

53. I have never dyed my hair. It's still a dirty-dishwater brown color.

54. I have mysteriously started receiving the magazine Lucky. Did you buy it for me? I keep asking around, but no one seems to know where it came from.

55. In 2008, I took The Fourth on a trip around our beautiful state on back roads, staying in bed and breakfasts and enjoying the small and wonderful towns of South Carolina. I can't wait until we do it again, this time touring the upstate! (I hear there are more vineyards in the upstate!)

56. I made sweet tea for the first time this summer. I now drink it almost every day.

57. I was an athletic trainer in high school. I even signed on National Signing Day to be a trainer at Presbyterian College.

58. I only did athletic training for 2 years at PC. I quit to join a sorority where they didn't make me wear a fanny pack.

59. I can not run. At all. I think my heart would just give out if I was ever chased.

60. I can, however, walk. Long long distances. I love it, I just wish it didn't take so much time!

61. I thought about doing one of those 60 mile breast cancer walks. But then I found out you have to stay in tents at night. If anyone hears of a walk where you get to drink pinot grigio in your hotel jacuzzi at nights, count me in!

62. (This one will not be about exercise. Promise!) I am strangely drawn to forensic books. I love serial killers! Wait, that sounds weird.

63. I was on Facebook early on. Like, when you had to have a college email account and PC wasn't even on it yet, so I had to use my USC one. True Story.

64. My new favorite summer drink is vodka and grapefruit juice. Yummmm.

65. I have a vanity plate. It says "MARY D" Cute, right? (Um, don't answer that. I got it when I was 17 and now just have to keep it! I'd never remember my plate numbers otherwise).

66. I love love love spicy food. The Fourth can't handle anything remotely spicy. We often have 2 types of salsa in the fridge.

67. I can't really sing. You'll only see me sing in church or in my car. And it's very off-key.

68. I did my Senior Seminar on how the mercury in vaccines does not cause Autism. Five years later, the FDA and CDC agreed. Told ya so.

69. I love roller coasters but get really throw-uppy on the Fair rides. Too much spinning around.

70. I think Twitter has is just AOL Instant Messenger away messages.

71. I don't watch much TV, but am currently watching these shows on NetFlix: "Rescue Me," "Friday Night Lights," "Weeds," and "How I Met Your Mother."

72. We are still watching "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" every night (read all about it here!). And, yes, you should feel sorry for me.

73. My 10 year high school reunion is this summer. Whoa. I mean....whoa.

74. I have a hard time saying some words (probably because I'm talking way too fast and my mouth gets all jumbled up). The worst one is "jewelry."

75. Also? I tend to say "birfday" instead of "birthday." My Elizabeth, my favorite speech therapist, can give me some lessons.

76. Even though I sound like a priss-pot, I can be a tomboy. I grew up going to Big Daddy's hunt club, playing in the dirt, and fishing in the pond!

77. Big Daddy is over six feet tall, but I'm pretty shrimpy. My Mom was five feet and her parents were 4'10" and 4'11". I had no hope.

78. I only applied to Presbyterian College for undergrad. I started my application for Wofford, but got really frustrated with the dumb "What Do You Want to Do With Your Life?" questions and threw it away.

79. Similar to #8, I also know my debit card number. This comes in handy when I call 1-800-WACHOVIA in a dressing room to see if I could buy the cute new dress.

80. I didn't declare a major until my 5th semester in college (when they make you).

81. I then changed several times: Physics, Math, Computer Science, Business and, finally, Biology.

82. The Fourth and I performed a Dave Ramsey Plasectomy this year. No more credit cards ever again!

83. I have an amazing cousin named Vicki who is like an older sister to me. She even used to live with us in the summers when I was a kid and she was a bored teenager in Lee County. We don't get to see each other often, but we can always pick right up where we left off. And she has a bunch of cute kids. That's fun.

84. Me, my mom and my grandmother were all named Mary.

85. The Fourth, his Dad and his grandfather were all named Stan. (Duh, hence "The Fourth.")

86. The best concert I've ever been to was Train in Augusta the summer after I graduated college. It was so hot but so very fun!

87. I like to listen to Beth Moore's "Wednesdays with Beth" series on my morning walks.

88. Countries I've visited: Mexico, England, Scotland, Austrailia, the Bahamas (that's a separate country, right?)

89. I am very freckly on my face, shoulders, knees and legs. I also get sunburned in seconds in the sun.

90. I love salty foods. I crave salty snacks more than I crave sweets.

91. I also love vegetables - I've been known to eat bell peppers, tomatoes, or broccoli as a snack instead of chips and crackers. It would totally freak out my roommate Emily when I'd bite into a bell pepper like an apple!

92. The Fourth's favorite pasttime is to go deep-sea fishing. I've been and would just assume he leave me on the beach with my book, thank you very much.

93. I make my own laundry detergent. It sounds like I'm really green, but really, I'm just cheap.

94. My favorite part of my job is that I only work 30 hours a week.

95. I didn't have any allergies as a kid, but seemed to become allergic to every single thing in college. I am sneezing as I write this, actually.

96. I sneeze in threes. I sneeze twice. Then the 3rd one come a few minutes later. Every time.

97. I have been in Junior League of Columbia for 4 years. I have had so much fun with it and made some friends I would have never met otherwise.

98. I can not wear jeans from April to October -- Too Hot!

99. Well, I have been wearing my new fancy white jeans this summer.

100. I'm certified in CPR and, thank goodness, have never had to perform it. One time I thought I was going to have to when I found a woman on the floor at Belk's. (She came to and I called a manager. Way easier than rescue breathing.)

We made it! Give yourself a big pat on the back for reading through all of that! Here's to 100 more posts!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Thoughts on Marriage

2010-06-11T07:06:00.000-04:00

I babysit a Little Darling every week. She and I have the best conversations and she has a lot of insight for an 8 year old.

Recent conversation about marriage:

Little Darling - "I think I'd like to marry an NFL player who makes millions so I won't have to work."

Me - "You know, you could be rich by yourself. You don't have to marry someone rich." (I like to encourage independence. I want to be a good influence!)

Little Darling - "That's a good point. But it'd be nice not to work."

Me - {Nodding in agreement}

Little Darling - "Of course, it'd be pretty cool to marry someone who works at San Jose. They make the best enchiladas!"

Me - "Something to definitely consider..." {uncontrollable snickering}

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

www.allrecipes.com

My Own Toy Story

2010-06-10T07:14:00.000-04:00

Toy Story 3 is coming out this summer and I'm pretty darn excited. Movies have gotten pretty expensive lately and I'm only going to a movie if I know I'm getting my money's worth. (I should note, I did not feel like I got my money's worth from SATC2. If you saw it yourself, you know what I'm talking about.) Fortunately, I can pretty much count on getting a good deal if Tom Hanks is involved. I'm just saying.

I really connect with the Toy Story because I've had my own toy story. Meet my beloved Minnie Mouse:

When we went to Disney World when I was 4 years old, it was not your dream vacation. I had strep throat and a fever. My mom was very pregnant with The Fifth. And it turns out the Disney employees are real sticklers about riding roller coasters 8 months pregnant. Poor Mom could only ride on "It's a Small World" with the elderly and sleeping toddlers. You may say you love that ride, but after 5 or 6 times, you really realize how cheesy it is. And I remember a great deal of rain, especially for Florida.

I guess Mom & Big Daddy really felt bad for me and let me pick out a stuffed animal to bring home as a souvenir. Little did they know I would hold on to this souvenir for the next 20 years. It's proved to be a great investment. I bet stuffed animals at Disney require bank loans now.

Minnie has been the best friend I've ever had. She endured my death grip every night. She went on many trips to various camps and "survived" being stuffed in suitcases. She even went to college with me (my stuffed animal is smarter than your stuffed animal!).

But as Minnie approaches her 23rd birthday, she's looking a little rough. Her ear is falling off, despite being sewn on several times. And she long ago lost her tail (I used to twirl her around by her tail. That lasted about 1 year before she flew off). Her eyes are scratched; I like to say she has cataracts. Her dress is barely there, so I just wrap it around her a la "Toga Party." Her pantaloons are stained with my drool. But you just can't beat that kind of loyalty. The Fourth won't even let me drool on him!

When I got married, I put Minnie in the guest bedroom. But if I'm sick or feeling down, I go right in there and fall asleep with a death grip around my Minnie.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Blackberries. And not the phones.

2010-06-09T07:14:00.000-04:00

Big Daddy and I spent a great Sunday afternoon picking blackberries. We drove out to Big Daddy's famed hunt club - Hatiola - and put some blood, sweat and a couple tears into our blackberry harvest. The sweat part was obvious; it was 96 degrees. The blood came from getting a little too greedy and getting caught up in the briars. Actually, that's where the tears came in, too. But it was all totally worth it and we got a whole gallon of berries in just a couple hours! I'm starting to really understand why they charge a small fortune for blackberries at the grocery store.

Here's a prime blackberry ripe on the vine. Mmmm...my mouth is watering just looking at it!

Big Daddy hard at work. It's a whole new world with a new knee, I tell ya.

Look at our bounty!

On the way home, we saw some ripe orange plums. So, of course, I had to get some. Needed a little snack, you know.

And now it's time to make these delicious cocktails featured in Southern Living this month. I don't normally drink gin, but I think I could make an exception. Oh yes, I think I could.

Ingredients

Fresh mint sprigs (uh, does anyone have a mint plant I can come steal some sprigs from? I'm mostly looking at you Anne Says So's husband!)
Cucumber slices
Fresh blackberries picked at Hatiola
3/4 cup fresh lime juice (about 3 limes)
8 to 12 tsp. powdered sugar
1 cup plus 2 Tbsp. gin
1 cup cold club soda
Crushed ice

Preparation

1. Place first 5 ingredients in a large pitcher. Gently press mint leaves, cucumbers, and blackberries against side of pitcher with a wooden spoon to release flavors. Stir in gin and club soda. Serve over ice. Garnish, if desired, with cucumber slices, fresh blackberries, lime wedges, mint springs.

And now my senior yearbook

2010-06-07T11:31:00.001-04:00

At my high school, our activities were listed next to our senior class picture. It was very important to me to have the longest list next to my picture (I was very into "being involved." Glad it's not like that anymore...ahem.)

So, I joined obscure groups, like the French Club. I should note, I never took French. Turns out, the French Club was not too picky whether you knew any French or not. Wee, wee. Or is it Oui, oui? Who knows; I took Latin. Et tu?

Yes, I realize I was "That Girl." The Fourth and I have made many observations that we absolutely would not have gotten along in high school. Or in college for that matter. I was the girl who sat front and center and wanted to answer all the teacher's questions (think "Hermione" from Harry Potter). The Fourth was the slacker in the back who threw spitballs at girls like me. Just goes to show you could never imagine who you might end up with.

So I know you're dying to see my senior class picture, so here ya go:

Now you see why people always recognize me, even 10 years later? I. Look. The. EXACT. Same. I tried to get layers cut in my hair recently, but I still feel like they are a lame attempt at trying to look mature. Maybe I should go blonde? But I have a feeling I wouldn't be real good at keeping up with roots (my layers are pretty grown out right now as it is), so maybe I should just try Sun-In. Hm, do they even still make Sun-In??

And, yes, I am wearing pearls in the picture. I'm actually wearing pearls right now as I write this post. Some things just never change.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

"I Hat You"

2010-06-06T11:05:00.000-04:00

Yearbooks were the absolute best part of the end of a school year. I would get unbelievably excited to get everyone to sign my yearbook. On more than one occasion, The Fifth (my brother) compared me to Melissa Joan Hart's character from "Can't Hardly Wait."

www.imdb.com

"These are memories we'll treasure forever!"

But my very first yearbook (Leaphart Elementary, 1988-1989) was marred by some punk kid. Note the message in black, to the left:

Who writes mean things in yearbooks?? Also, who misspells "hate??" I can only assume that this kid is now in a penitentiary system somewhere.

Of course, now this has become a family joke. Whenever anyone is upset, they will pout and say, "I Hat You!" I guess it is pretty funny now, but definitely traumatizing to see as a 5 year old with a "have-to-be-loved-by-everyone-complex."

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Our Dogs Are Strange

2010-06-05T10:44:00.003-04:00

This is weird - Bailey, my step-dog, has started marching in place while he drinks water. We have no idea why he is doing this, but it's pretty funny to anyone who sees it!

In other weird-dog news, our old fat beagle, Lilly, has started rubbing her back on the carpet and making funny grunt noises. Keep in mind that this is the dog who got so fat she had a dislocated vertebrae and got million dollar shots to keep her alive. And that was 5 years ago. I swear she's going to outlive us all. (Big Daddy even asked the vet if he could get those shots in his knee!)

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Queen of the World

2010-05-25T14:43:00.000-04:00

ClipArt Crown

Recently I got promoted at work. It sounds like a bigger deal than it really is. Anyways, the promotion I really wanted to get was "Queen of the World." I have a lot of really great ideas, but I can't seem to get the whole earth to let me have free reign. I mean, I think I would be a fair and beloved leader. Here are some of my best ideas:

* It's time to introduce Siestas at work! I mean, if it's good enough for Spain, it's good enough for me! And, really, how much work do you even get done between 2 and 4pm? This is perfect naptime! Also - there are some days that I get off work before 2. On these days I'd like to have my Siesta around 10am. No since in wasting a good Siesta just because I'm leaving work early.

* Also in the workplace, I'm going to need more vacation. Like 12 weeks. I think if I can give you 3 weeks of good, hard work (well, except during the newly installed Siesta time), then my work should give me 1 week back a month. Fair's fair, I say.

* Effective immediately, all calories will be taken out of beer. I mean, I like to have a frosty brew or two on the lake, but it's really not advisable to have too many if I have plans on wearing a bathing suit for the rest of the summer. I think that if scientists (or brewers) can take the alcohol out to make O'Doul's, they really should be able to figure out how to take out the calories. And don't tell me to drink Mich Ultra...eeecch.

* Every driver will be required to take defensive driving every year. I'm going 25 mph in a school zone like I'm supposed to, so that does not mean you should shake your fist and try to squeal around me. It only makes it more awkward when we end up at the next red light right next to each other.

* Movie prices will be lowered to $1. The last time I went to the movies, we had to stop by the bank and ask for a loan. And I still had to sneak in my Jujubes. Somebody's getting too rich off movies and unless it's me...we're going to lower these prices! Also? Popcorn will be free because I know how cheap it is to make and it should not cost more than a filet mignon.

* Plane rides will be offered from Columbia to Sunset Beach for $10. I mean, I love the beach, but 3 hours back and forth is tough on this old girl.

* Teeth whitening treatments will stop making my teeth hurt when I eat ice cream. I'm tired of having to choose between white teeth and cookies and cream. That's a hard decision to make.

* Since I'll be queen and all, I'll need a Jeeves. I'm tired of driving (and fighting the aggressive drivers). I'd much prefer to ride around a la Driving Miss Daisy. But I promise I won't haggle my Jeeves on the right way to get to the A&P.

Not a bad start, if I do say so myself!

Eating & Drinking,

Queen Mary Douglass

A Moosie Wedding

2010-05-23T21:16:00.007-04:00

I've said it before - The Fourth has some weird nicknames for his friends. One of the more notorious ones is "Moosepie" aka "Moosie" for his friend Matt.

Well, now Mr. Moosepie has a Mrs. Moosepie. That's right, Matt got married!

It was what you would call a "whirlwind romance." They met in July, got engaged in December, and married in May! But, hey, when you know it's love...you know.

The wedding was fancy. And awesome. Ever heard of The Woodlands Inn in Summerville, SC? I had not, mostly because I had never been invited to the only 5-Star resort in South Carolina (take that Kiawah!). Think "old plantation house" meets "best service you've ever had in your life." That's The Woodlands.

Here's a picture from their website:

Told you it was fancy.

Here are the highlights of weekend:

* Mr. and Mrs. Moosepie covered the whole weekend for all the guests. In the fancy house, not just the Hampton Inn down the road. Do you know how glorious it is to check out of one of the nicest places you've ever stayed and hear, "There's no charge, Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Have a nice ride home." That. Is. Glorious.

* There was a delightful welcome basket and itinerary in our rooms. I love a schedule and tiny crackers. Unfortunately, The Fourth ate all the cheddar bunnies before I could get to them. I was not happy.

* Our room had a king size bed. The Fourth and I both slept as "starfishes."

* After the rehearsal dinner, the bride and groom paid the jazz band to continue playing on the front porch of the house...late night. At 3am, the bride's mother called to complain about all the noise (and, add that her daughter needed her beauty rest for her wedding the next day, for heavens sake!) The front desk clerk kindly told her, "Ma'am, that's your daughter causing all the racket." Love it!

* The Fourth tried to teach Mrs. Moosepie to shag. He said she leads too much, too. But, there is an amazing picture from their dancing lesson, thanks to the bride's sister:

* The Woodlands has a signature drink and it changed my life. It involved Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka, cranberry juice, sour mix, lime juice and...wait for it...cayenne pepper. I'm telling you, it was wonderful! Who wants to experiment with the proportions this summer?

* Mr. and Mrs. Moosepie will be featured on the front of the Charleston official wedding guide. Celebrities, I tell ya.

* They are a very attractive couple. Don't you wish you looked this good on your wedding day? (Sadly, I did not. I was very sweaty; it was August in Columbia for heavens sake.)

Overall, it was a great wedding weekend and one we'll definitely remember! Best wishes, Mr. and Mrs. Moosie!

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

Point, Click....Put it Down!

2010-05-21T10:44:00.002-04:00

May means weddings. It certainly has meant weddings for us this year. The past two weekends, we travelled to some really neat places for some beautiful weddings.

I go could on and on and on about wedding etiquette (in fact, I think I have several times before!). But I think I may just have to climb on my high horse one more time. Well, I'm sure I'll get on it again, but that shouldn't really be a surprise.

What's got me bothered this time? Amateur Photographers.

You are a guest at a wedding. A classy wedding. Your job is to dress appropriately, smile, speak to the bride, thank the hosts, and eat jumbo shrimp and drink pinot grigio. You are not the photographer. Wedding photography is big business. So big that the bride had to reserve a chunk of her budget just for the photographer, album, proofs and portrait. And the photographer she's paying the big bucks for has a really nice camera.

You, however, have a point and shoot you picked up on sale at Best Buy. Stop taking pictures during the ceremony! The bride does not need shots of their vows with guests heads in the bottom of the picture. That's why the photographer gets to take pictures in the aisle. She also does not need shots of her coming down the aisle with a man's shoulder in the side of the picture. That one just won't make it to the album.

Save your pictures for the reception. Take lots of great pics of the crowd and the band and send the bride a couple.

This insanity has got to stop! What's next? Guests start bringing their own instruments to play as the bride walks down the aisle? Guests lead the vows from the pews??

Is it just me? Hm, maybe... But that doesn't mean my blood pressure doesn't sky-rocket every time I hear a "click, click, click" in the pews.

Eating and Drinking,

Mary Douglass

PS: Don't let this post offend you too much if you are an amateur photographer. You know how I have a tendency to overreact about weddings.

PPS: But it really does bother me. Right up there with wearing white to weddings.